Posts Tagged: Testicles

Testicle Double Entendre Just Insouciant Enough To Avoid Designation Of Vulgarity

"'The whole idea of a signboard is to get people to stop, without being overtly crass,' said Brian Peck, manager of the Meatball Shop in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, whose own sign read 'Spring For Our Balls' on Wednesday."


Blame Your Dad's Giant Balls For His Shitty Parenting

"A link between the size of a father's testicles and how active he is in bringing up his children has been suggested by scientists. Researchers at Emory University, US, said those with smaller testicles were more likely to be involved with nappy changing, feeding and bath time. They also found differences in brain scans of fathers looking at images of their child, linked to testicle size."


Chewy Balls: The Steroids Of Antiquity

"Forget anabolic steroids in easy-to-swallow tablets, or EPO in clean syringes. Ancient Olympic dopers got their pre-Games hormone boost from chewing on raw animal testicles."


Science Finally Discovers A Way To Make Men Use Condoms

"A dose of ultrasound to the testicles can stop the production of sperm, according to researchers investigating a new form of contraception. A study on rats published in Reproductive Biology and Endocrinology showed that sound waves could be used to reduce sperm counts to levels that would cause infertility in humans. Researchers described ultrasound as a 'promising candidate' in contraception. However, far more tests are required before it could be used."\

Previously: "'Don't Worry About It, Baby, I Use A Lot Of Wi-Fi'"


Little Girl Likes Squeezing Her Father's Balls

"My daughter had no idea what they were, she just knew it was a toy she liked. They're fuzzy, supersoft, and have that squishy Beanie Baby feel, so they're fun to play with." -Toymaker Emil Vicale discusses his newest product, "a pink, plushy pair of 'cojones' topped with coarse black hair," that Vicale was inspired to create after hearing Sarah Palin questioning President Obama's "cojones." This article is a festival of testicle-related punnery, but I'll pull out two more for ya: "I almost died when I heard Palin say that. After that, I knew I had to give Palin the cojones she wanted." AND. "I can just see [...]


Why Aren't We Detesticling More Roosters?

"It’s just a chicken with its nuts cut off."


"They bite because they’re hungry, and testicles sit nicely in their mouth."

"Testicle-eating fish, the Pacu, found in Paris with fears it could be coming to the UK" —The photo is horrifying.


Balls Hurt? Here's Why!

"The number of men suffering from painful testicular problems is on the rise – thanks to the current fashion for tight jeans, experts have claimed."


The Ball That Stared Back

"Doctors who took an ultrasound of a man's testicles to find out what was causing him pain were astounded to find a gaping face staring back at them." You'd better believe there's a picture.


Testicles, Four Ways

Sure, you will learn how to cook testicles from this article about Achewood creator Chris Onstad, but you will also learn so much more than that. WARNING: Contains testicles.


If You Need To Get "Squirrel Testicles," "Facebook" And "French Bank" Into The Same Sentence It Is Your Lucky Day

"A French bank has been slammed after posting an image on Facebook of a squirrel with its testicles trapped in a bird feed stand." Sigh, yeah, there's a photo, but I mean, really?


"Your Testicles Look So Much More Symmetrical, Have You Been Working Out?"

"Chin Implant Augments Man's Testicles, Self-Esteem"


Testicle Bitten

"A BRIT was bitten 'down under' by a killer snake while answering a call of nature in the Aussie bush. The reptile sunk its fangs into Jackson Scott's testicle as he squatted in the dark. But when he begged best mate Roddy Andrews to suck the venom out, his pal REFUSED." The phrase "wedding tackle" is also used.


Balls Of Justice

In what is perhaps part of editor Elizabeth Spiers' ongoing staff training exercises, Observer reporters are now scanning the dockets of our nation's courtrooms to find all the testicle-related jurisprudence therein.