I didn't see a lot of movies this year; did I miss anything good? Oh, no reason.
So… basically The Artist is about this chick who meets a much older guy like three times for all of 30 seconds each and then she devotes her life to stalking/saving him, despite him being a married, entitled, pitiful, self-serving alcoholic, and despite her being a smart, savvy, talented, sexy professional, and then also the only black people in the film are literally carrying spears and wearing loincloths? And really hot French guys are actually made kind of ugly when they have gross tiny mustaches?
Right, that's what I thought, just checking.
What do Dancing at Lughnasa, Pearl Harbor and It's Complicated have in common? The answer may etc. you!
I can't stand Eli Roth. Everyone on the Internet has a strong opinion about him one way or the other, and the only difference between the two sides is that one is utterly fucking wrong. There are legions of horror fans who like him. There are oozy corners of the Web where he is worshiped and glorified. There are even fan clubs teeming with girls who think he's the zenith of swoony hotness or whateverthehell fangirls think. They are all tragically mistaken. Don't take it personally, fangirls-your mental slowness is part of the human condition. We're all morons about something. I think Jeff Dunham's kinda funny.
Okay, so this is super-serious. What we expected to have happen for the ten Best Picture nominees is not at all what happened in real life. Instead of the inclusion of commercially popular films like The Hangover and even possibly Star Trek, we ended up with a shocking inclusion of A Serious Man-which deserves it, sorry haters!-and… The Blind Side. One thing: there's not a single comedy in there. (Unless you count the Coen brothers, which, too dark to even be comedy.)
That there are two performances nominated from Invictus-Morgan Freeman as best actor and Matt Damon as best supporting-is a horror show.
More shockingly? This is the [...]
"Let's acknowledge that the Oscars are bullshit and we hate them…. Crash as best picture? What the fuck." -The wonderful New York Times film critic Manohla Dargis.