38. Game rating, theme, plot eliminates need to urinate, file taxes, experience bodily shame.
37. Lifelong contempt of evolutionary theory culminating in ill-thought out plan to stop rampaging monkey, without consulting police, humane society, press, etc.
36. Failure to understand nuances of newly installed alien government.
35. No school will hire substitute teacher named Solid Snake.
34. Prefer being shot at, stomped upon, devoured by monsters, spine mutilation, to honest conversation with friends, family, spouse.
33. Non-raiding, -assassin, -bloodsport job felt too "corporate."
25) Coupons for candy
24) Pictures of people hitting a piñata from a different piñata party. Everyone will assume they are from your piñata party and it will come across as very clever
23) Dozens of smaller piñatas
22) Sausage links simulating piñata entrails
21) Slips of paper, each with a word that rhymes with piñata: regatta, ricotta, stigmata, sonata… that’s about it actually
20) Bygone knickknacks that someone sentimental might pick up and say, “Oh, this would be lovely on the mantel… if it hadn’t been beaten into pieces”
19) Already scratched lottery tickets
1. Music and Lyrics (2007)
The first 2 minutes and 31 seconds of Music and Lyrics contain some fine filmmaking. A caption tells us that we're watching a music video from 1984 called "Pop! Goes My Heart" by Pop. Everything about it is spot on: the black and white set, Scott Porter's big hair and loping dance moves (Jason Street from "Friday Night Lights"!), and Hugh Grant, bless him, mime-sings his little heart out.
And let's talk about the song. From the keyboard flourishes, the falsetto of the "Gold and silv-ah-hah!" leading into the bright harmonies of the chorus, the handclap punctuating the "Pop!" (and the sweet countering [...]