OH YES. "And women no longer need to be beautiful in order to express their talent. Lena Dunham and Adele and Lady Gaga and Amy Adams are all perfectly plain, and they are all at the top of their field."

Actual words, typed consecutively, and somehow published. Despite the obvious questions—how the hell did poor Amy Adams get wrapped up in that claim!? And also "how soon is Adele going to BEAT YOU TO DEATH?"—I also… I… I don't know where to start with Stephen Marche's half-profile of Megan Fox for Esquire. I thought the mens' mags had moved on from hiring ghouls—I mean, smart ones even!—to be ghoulish [...]

It is okay to drink blue cocktails again, so long as you aren't particularly concerned about concepts like "dignity" and "self-respect." [Via]

Would you like to know what was voted to be the VERY BEST AMERICAN MAGAZINE COVER of the year 2011, by the editors of magazines near you? The answer may surprise you. (Or cause any other number of negative emotions, at least in part because it's, you know, fake?)

"Given the recent stateside popularity of the espadrille…the evening slip-on has big potential for a life outside the opera house." —GIRL. NO.

"Imagine if this were written about Jews, blacks, Muslims or Latinos…" —Everybody needs to shut the f**k up about Go the F**k to Sleep right f**king now.

Story time! Gather round! So, a few years ago, a single woman had a few beers and made out with guy on Halloween and didn't have sex with him.

And then later, when she was better known, a guy anonymously wrote a story about it on the Internet.

I know I'm not alone in thinking that, clearly, she is a horrible slut. And one who definitely shouldn't have a job or be taken seriously. And him? Just an innocent, nameless dude who met a slut one time. On accident. Accidental slut meeting! And so it's really interesting reading, right? That people (don't) have sex and do drink alcohol. [...]

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I just gave the go ahead to Corrections Director to proceed with Gardner's execution. May God grant him the mercy he denied his victims.Fri Jun 18 06:02:49 via TwitBird iPhoneMark ShurtleffMarkShurtleff

Well, Jesus HMS Christ hanging on the cross, this really beats all.

A bus will be available for transport from @occupywallstnyc to the RNC in Tampa (and DNC in Charlotte!) Signup thingy: docs.google.com/spreadsheet/em…

— Michael Tracey (@mtracey) August 20, 2012

Would anyone like to take the Occupy bus from New York to Tampa this weekend and then not let us know what happens? That would be great.

Why don't you lazy women want to throw away your money investing in pyramid schemes startups? This man literally doubled his money by angel investing—in just eight short years. Don't you silly girls want in on this big man business?

Anderson Cooper will come around and personally try to ruin your life now, with hidden camera jerk pranks which take up peoples' lunch hours and hours of their lives that they'll never get back. Reports one victim: "ultimately what I felt was not anger or amusement but a profound helplessness. When it was a man being awful in the back of a restaurant, I couldn’t do anything. When it was an actor being awful in the back of a restaurant, I could do less. I had been working with rules that were not rules. I had made assumptions based on experience and observations, assumptions made invalid by a [...]

Dear Occupy Wall Street,

Please invent your own 他妈的 iconography.

Thanks!

China

“I think more straight men are doing stranger workouts. A lot more people are going to yoga and pilates… and it’s more social, and people are dressing up a little bit more." The zeitgeist of New York City, according to the New York Post and a gay gadabout. Goodness. It's almost like every young person goes through the same trends every two years and announces them as global!

Well, well. Now what the White House is putting out there isn't that bad but… well, it's pretty bad. Putting foremost their concern about the housing market totally, you know, freaking out over bazillions of houses in interrupted foreclosure, with no clear titles, the Obama administration's message is therefore that… housing market security… will come… when we can get back on track to throwing people out of their houses despite that all the foreclosures that are being contested and brought to court… are found to have improprieties. Bad play.

Let your brain try this for a while. My brain entirely rejects it. (via.)

"Among the most unusual things about How to Be Gay is that it is, at heart, a 500-plus-page work that explores a fundamental kind of gay sensibility by concentrating almost exclusively on one actress, Joan Crawford, and on a single scene in a single movie, the 1945 drama Mildred Pierce." —Man. Book publishing, what is the deal.

"We didn't get to sit in while U2 created their songs or when Picasso painted, but for the past 17 years, we've been able to watch Rivera step into crises over and over and over, throwing the same pitch over and over and over even when hitters knew which pitch was coming, and almost always Rivera has come out the other side shaking hands and high-fiving teammates."

Yeah, dear Occupy: please don't taunt the cops with donuts on a stick.

"As art tends to require the passage of time, it could also be that Scarborough's song is just the first in a series of more reflective cultural examinations of the last 10 years. Such works cannot change the last decade, cannot bring back brave soldiers, but they can offer hope that the years will bring greater understanding. As Scarborough concludes: 'At the end of the hour / When I'm drained of all power / I still find the reason to believe.'" —UH, TV TALKING HEAD JOE SCARBOROUGH WROTE A 9/11 SONG. (He used to be a lawyer in a band, you know, back in the day.) And THEN [...]