In these overclocking times, watches are nothing but a giant wad of burned cash hanging on your wrist. They're like a vulgar codpiece of consumption, but, like, on your arm. They are, almost, evil.
They're heavy. They're annoying. They're pretty much duplicative. They're one more thing to sweat under in summer. They leave very awkwardly shaped tan lines. Also, yes, sometimes they're very pretty!