"We understand that you refuse to release this frustrated whale because he is your chief sperm bank, and we know from SeaWorld's own director of safety (as well as videos on the web) that the way you get his sperm is by having someone get into the pool and masturbate him with a cow's vagina filled with hot water. Even during my wildest days with Motley Crue, I never could've imagined something so sick and twisted. Simply put, how can SeaWorld claim that trainers no longer have direct contact with this whale when they are jacking him off? That is about as 'direct' as it gets. I hope it [...]

"Given the present findings, it's now thought that sperm whales may be important sentinels of ocean health, revealing what organic pollutants persist in the marine environment. They may also provide information on specific regions of the Pacific, especially because females and juveniles tend to stay within a 621-mile range. Sierra Rayne of the University of Victoria and colleagues conducted earlier research on free-ranging orcas, also known as killer whales, and found evidence that they too retain pollutants. In this case, chemical markers for flame retardant compounds were detected in killer whale blubber biopsy samples." —Great. Not only are we poisoning the ocean and filling the sea-creatures we like [...]