"They abuse power as much as bankers do, and they make the average person feel insecure about themselves: ‘Why am I not Sarah Jessica Parker?' It gets very existential, because you first got into it because you were interested in these artists, but these folks are not artists, they're just famous." -Joanna Molloy understands gossip folk.

What exactly is News gossipmonger Joanna Molloy trying to do with her bizarre screed on how she could never even think of sleeping with many-times-married CNN yakmeister Larry King, even as she spends 564 words doing exactly that? Is it misguided satire of the way ladies' sexuality is brushed under the rug as they age? Did a slightly tepid item on some D-lister fall through at the last minute? Is she engaging in an extended troll for incisive comments like "Larry's already dreaming of his next wedding cake,it doesn't matter to him what the bride looks like,he love's that wedding cake !"? Or is this some weird attempt to [...]