Posts Tagged: Fuck You
45

Lena Dunham, Adele, Lady Gaga, Amy Adams All Very Ugly, Says "Esquire"

OH YES. "And women no longer need to be beautiful in order to express their talent. Lena Dunham and Adele and Lady Gaga and Amy Adams are all perfectly plain, and they are all at the top of their field."

Actual words, typed consecutively, and somehow published. Despite the obvious questions—how the hell did poor Amy Adams get wrapped up in that claim!? And also "how soon is Adele going to BEAT YOU TO DEATH?"—I also… I… I don't know where to start with Stephen Marche's half-profile of Megan Fox for Esquire. I thought the mens' mags had moved on from hiring ghouls—I mean, smart ones even!—to be ghoulish [...]

166

How To Cook A Fucking Steak

Go to the goddamn grocery and get steak. Yes, the grocery. A little ammonia is not going to kill you, you pussy. You want to be all fancy and grass-fed and environmentally conscious, go ahead, I don't give a shit, just get a fucking steak. Ribeye is good. And, yes, bone-in. Schmuck. Take the steak home. Get a bigass frying pan and put the shit on the stove, cranking the heat up as far as that fucker will go. Take a shitload of salt—rocksalt, you dumb motherfucker, none of that fine-grained crap here—and toss it around the bottom of the pan.

20

50 Cent Wants In On Cee-Lo's Action, Will Take His Gold Digger

"Ironically, this week the Pajamas Media site ran a piece reporting that Egyptian Islamic scholar and self-proclaimed jihadist Abd al-Muti Bayum has condemned the 'Ground Zero mosque' as a devious 'Zionist conspiracy' to discredit Islam by linking it to the September 11 attacks. This was cited as an argument against the Cordoba Center. This is strange logic: the center shouldn't be built because radical Islamists will like it…. or because they will hate it." That's Reason's Cathy Young, whose colleague Radley Balko gave us such a good angle on the "NYC Terror Mosque" controversy last week.

4

Funemployment: Say Hi To Jobless People Who Are Better Than You

"Funemployment" was a mildly irritating coinage back about 8 months ago when people started losing their jobs in earnest; now it's a subject for wacky trend pieces by network news organizations who, staring at the terrible jobless numbers, are starting to freak out and look for any kind of "bright side" report they can deliver to help forestall a revolution against capitalism. Anyway, did you know that, unlike those of us whose panic over lost wages and limited opportunities has resulted in growing alcoholism, strained relationships, and physical manifestations of serious stress including but not limited to acne eruptions, hypertension, deep depression, and ulcers, there are some people who [...]

6

Cee-Lo, "Forget You" (Spoiler: Not As Good As "F**k You")

If you'd like to hear the radio-friendly version of Cee-Lo's "Forget You," which is the version of "Fuck You" that the world is allowed to hear on the airwaves, go to Trevor Green's BBC show and fast-forward to minute 52. It really kind of doesn't work. Radio! You have to wonder why it exists sometimes.