"Amy, a single mother living in a middle-class suburb (she asked that only her middle name be used), is an educated professional who is reasonably savvy in most medical matters. But every month she goes through an arduous, prolonged and humiliating process: filling a Ritalin prescription for herself and her 11-year-old son." READ MORE

Now, I'm sure many of us have found ourselves engaging in illicit behavior under regrettable circumstances. Public bathrooms are far from the most hygienic places, yet a public bathroom is sometimes the only available place to take drugs. Still, you have to think these ladies could have found a more suitable surface from which to snort cocaine than a piece of wood just outside a cage which apparently houses an animal at a state fair. I mean, Jesus, it could have been a llama!

"Detectives at Miami International Airport busted a London teen who they say was carrying nearly 30 pounds of cocaine — stuffed in 24 boxes of cake mix. Ayesha Olivia Niles, a waifish 5-foot-4, 105-pound student, had arrived in Miami on a night flight from Jamaica, two suitcases in tow. The teen claimed she did not know what the substance was but admitted 'she suspected that the activity she was involved in was suspicious but she did not question it,' according to the report." READ MORE

“It was a tree, and there was one leaf left on the tree, and I wondered: ‘Wow, if you can make it through winter, you may be here until next year. Wouldn’t that be great, if you were just the only guy that hung on?’ I guess you could say everything’s a metaphor for everything else, but sometimes it’s just what it is. It’s just what it’s about—about a tree.” READ MORE

An artist out of Brooklyn by the name of Mr. Muthafuckin' eXquire has his borough in his blood—a little of Biggie's deep-lunged authority comes through in his style, and a little of Ol' Dirty Bastard's unhinged perviness, too—and he has an underground hit on his hands with a song called "Huzzah," which was produced by the death-obsessed hardcore veteran Necro. For the remix, he gathered an impressive collection of avant garde MCs—Queens' Despot, Detroit's Danny Brown, hometown faves Das Racist, and the venerable Def Jux Records founder El-P (who wears a large mustache and reminds us again how terrific and ahead-of-its-time his old group Company Flow was). Then they all filmed this great video, which puts a goofy, drugged-out spin on the one Bad Boy Records made back in 1995 for the all-star remix of Craig Mack's "Flava In Ya Ear." READ MORE

We're looking at a spate of days in the 90s starting this weekend, so, uh, stay off the pipe: READ MORE

This is the song that just got 21-year-old Oakland rapper Kreayshawn a million-dollar deal with Sony Records? (ALLEGEDLY. I mean, the deal is real; the million dollars is maybe a rumor.) Do you like it? I really do. It reminds me of Too $hort and Gucci Mane. Is that last part just because of its title? (No, I think it's also the wobbly weirdness.)