Anthony Weiner gave a press conference in which he quit his job in Congress: "and most importantly I can continue to heal from the damage I have caused" is something that he said, and well, okay? Wait, what? So long and good luck. See you in your new job on MSNBC soon most likely. Blech.

Ginger Lee, an "adult performer," gave a press conference with her attorney, Gloria Allred, who seems to be in multiple places at the same time somehow? Perhaps she is cloned? The topic: randy messages received from as-of-yesterday-but-not-as-of-today still-Congressman Anthony Weiner. And the magic that is New York took place. READ MORE

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I think the Mainstream Media, whatever that is, has been doing a very good job reporting on the New York 9th District Congressman Anthony Weiner and his naughties. I’m kinda sick of hearing about it, but that’s my fault, because I consume lots of super-obvious Lowest Common Denominator News and Infotainments, where I have heard a kabillion-jillion things about Anthony Weiner from my teevee in the morning when I put the stupid TODAY show on and then in the bathroom, where I perform my morning ablutions in the manner of Pontius Pilate (one of History’s notable Public Servants), and I hear more about Anthony Weiner on the news programs on my radio. One of the programs I listen to while I am cleaning my teeth is a middle-of-the-road Traffic-and-Weather-Together kinda show and the other one is an hilarious Right-Wing syndicated thing that runs on a local Sports Radio channel, and they throw down on that show, man, when they talk about stuff like Mr. Weiner’s been doing, they call it “Perverted,” which I find it to be Highly Entertaining, when people get Judgmental about stuff, so I am hooked on that radio program, for reals, and I believe I am similar to zillions of people then, out here in the streets of Lowest Common Denominator, where I get my Info Feed, and where the info almost immediately gets processed by the American Jokes Industry and Entertainment Tonight and stuff. READ MORE

Everyone's been paying a lot of attention to one member of Congress these last two weeks, and next to none about the ones we should really be worried about. Let's start with David Rivera, recently cleared by the FEC for paying a third party to run attack ads, but what about everything else, it is pointed out today? Such as: half a million dollars from a dog track? The amended financial disclosure forms, after his reports that attributed his income to USAID were rebutted by... USAID? Also, yes, there is that time that his car somehow ran down an opponent's truck that was carrying fliers that were, well, "produced by Rivera's campaign opponent at the time, that included a last-minute attack on Rivera's character and detailed past domestic violence accusations against him." Still under investigation by at least two agencies, his Wikipedia is a battleground!

Delightful New York Post harridan Andrea Peyser does not disappoint today, after her bravura performance of wife-related questions at Anthony Weiner's press conference yesterday: "The gorgeous and furious Internet cuckold Huma Abedin refused yesterday to stand by her man. She did not show up to walk the plank of public humiliation, the way doormat Silda did for her whoremonger husband, Eliot Spitzer." READ MORE

There's several proven tactics to conducting a press conference with humiliating personal admissions and one of them is exhausting everyone, which was pretty successful with Anthony Weiner's confession of sharing "personal photos" with women he did not know (six in three years, most before his marriage) online. Everyone was exhausted, except maybe the New York Post's Andrea Peyser, who really, really wanted to know where his wife Huma was. (At least that's what she kept screaming.)

But the press conference also ran counter to many of the prevailing ideas about crisis PR: one is to keep it short; another is have your wife with you. (The Spitzer event did both these things, and it may have been smart but it was also unsatisfying.) In any event, the press conference went something like this.

• "At the outset I'd like to make clear I've made terrible mistakes."

• Says: I have not been honest with myself, my family, constituents, friends, media, etc.

• Confirms the underwear photo.

• Says he made a "hugely regrettable mistake" after panicking.

• Apologizes to Huma.

• Cries.

• "I have engaged in several inappropriate conversations... and exchanged photos with six women over the last three years."

• "Some took place after" his marriage.

• "I haven't told the truth and I've done things I deeply regret. I brought pain to people I cared about the most."

• "This was a very dumb thing to do." (He was well-prepared by a professional; he returned to these talking points over and over.)

• Notably, he did not bring up the choice to not resign until the Q&A.

And then it went on and on.

I'd like to think it doesn't affect my ability to get bills passed, he said near what seemed like the end, but was nowhere near the end. One should note that Congressman Weiner has still not sponsored a single piece of successful legislation.

"Were you fully erect" is what someone at the press conference was screaming (likely suspect: Benjy Bronk, of the Howard Stern show) as Weiner left the podium, which sort of seems like both the most and the least important question of the day.

But how did local women take it?

I see. And?

Perhaps not so well.

This is very, very weird! Andrew Breitbart, who is a blogger, is taking questions from the press at a press conference, instead of Congressman Anthony Weiner, who is now late. He took the time to trash the bloggers who named the woman who came forward with the Weiner alleged crotch photos. "Salon dot com and Joan Walsh played the role that Weiner wanted...." Then he went on to trash Gawker. And "The Daily Kos." And: "I'm here also to get some answers as well!" Also he is guaranteeing that the Weiner pictures are of an "x-rated nature." (Which he will not release.) And someone asked—it sounded like Azi Paybarah, of the Observer?—why he posted the photos in the first place. He responded: "It's clearly a news story. Why are you trying to challenge a news story? ... This is a legitimate story and this is a continual attempt to blame the messenger." Now he is talking about ACORN and its "nefarious"-ness. And how he had to go around "the president's protectors in the media" to release the TRUTH about the evils of ACORN. Closing statements? "I've seen a lot of this Congressman's body. He's in very good shape." Then he challenged anyone to reveal a lie he's ever told. READ MORE

I just figured if I ignored it, it would all go away, and by "it" I mean Congressperson Anthony Weiner's digitized genitalia and the Internet trumpeting thereof. But the "story" is zooming well into week two, and one website, which is at this point entirely composed of Weiner alleged naked pic news, is going the extra mile with a promised all-day rollout of new pictures allegedly sent by Weiner to a lady constituent. (Just kidding: I think she lives out of his district.) So if you're inclined to play along with this spectacle as news, it seems to be beginning here. Why not? If you'd like to participate in the gleeful attempted destruction of a guy's career via the revelation of unverified and totally legal and consensual private behavior, have at it. (On the downside, the website claims "we will not be releasing all of the material because some of it is of an extreme, graphic nature." Hmm. That's a hard case to prosecute if you're not going to deliver the goods!) Anyway, today's another good day to remember that you are what you read. READ MORE