Monday, November 30, 2009
The Plot of 'Wintuk'
I will now relay to you the plot of Cirque du Soleil's Wintuk, which plays each holiday season in the 5600-seat WaMu Theater at Madison Square Garden. READ MORE
Pete Doherty was forced to exit a concert in Germany after angering the crowd by singing Nazi favorite "Deutschland, Deutschland Ãœber Alles." Met with boos and badfingers, Doherty "moved on to the next song but his manager pulled him off after his fourth song. 'After that, we could no longer guarantee his safety,'" said the program manager for the station broadcasting the show. I guess it's not exactly irony that singing a song associated with genocide might provoke violent rage in those who condemn it, but it's something... something there ought to be a German word for. | November 30, 2009
Depressed People Cannot See The Trees For The Forest
Depressed people have a hard time seeing fine detail, according to a Yale study. This is apparently a result of "a shortage of a neurotransmitter called GABA; this has also been linked to a visual skill called spatial suppression, which helps us suppress details surrounding the object our eyes are focused on – enabling us to pick out a snake in fallen leaves, for instance."
Bruce Dickinson Proved Prescient By Dubai Financial Crisis
It's not like we couldn't have seen it coming. But I guess the hubris of building fake islands in the shape of the the earth's continents didn't give enough people enough pause. (Or indoor ski slopes in the desert. Or the reports of slave labor. Or the frequent lightning strikes on the Burj Dubai.) But one man, one very wise man was calling out a warning long before most. Now, now, as the hot Arabian sun turns all our wings to ashes, we must pause during our long plummet and say: You were right, Bruce. We should have listened. We all should have listened far more closely to Iron Maiden lyrics.
Media Upset With Man For Repeatedly Uttering Five Syllable Word
The purpose of the press, writes an excitable James Fallows, "is supposed to be giving reality a better chance." But who the hell wants that? I'd much rather be informed about how many times my president uses a certain word. Turns out it's a lot! [Insert audible frustrated sigh here.]
A Call To Big Arms
A study entitled The Progressive Increase of Food Waste in America and its Environmental Impact found that we waste 1,400 calories per person per day which is enough food to sustain a very thin or small or old person or a regular biggish man-person if two people team up and waste food together. This is insane given the USDA's report that one-in-seven Americans did not have access to enough food last year. This sort of information, like the Times telling us that "many numbers of people use food stamps now: sadface," doesn't stay in my head because math is hard like reading books and shoplifting candy is so easy. READ MORE
"All the wise heads will tell us that 8 or 9 percent unemployment – maybe even 10 percent – is the 'new normal', and that only irresponsible people want to do anything about the situation. So what I see is years of terrible job markets, combined with political paralysis."
-Paul Krugman makes me reconsider the wisdom of getting out of bed this morning. Or any morning, for that matter. | November 30, 2009
The Poetry Section: Jennifer L. Knox, 'Short People'
Today in The Poetry Section: Three poems by Jennifer L. Knox, including Baywatch and Short People. READ MORE
Woman Takes Tumble
Here is grainy footage of an aerialist falling 40 feet to the floor at some mall in California. She sustained wrist and pelvis injuries, making it okay to say that this is probably the worst part of the whole story:
The 26-year-old woman slipped while hanging upside down from a solid metal hoop suspended from the ceiling during the finale of the show "Hunky Santa and the Candy Cane Girls" Saturday evening, said Ray Pierce, owner of Hollywood Aerial Arts, the firm putting on the performance.Also, is it terrible that I keep watching it over and over?
Here's a solution to your recession worries: Japanese poems! "Working on a haiku is the perfect anecdote when life's financial challenges mount. Compose one in your head when you're stuck in traffic or as you're waiting in line at the supermarket to pay with your ever thinner wallet." | November 30, 2009
Karl Lagerfeld Made This For You
This SpongeBob SquarePants figurine fetched $1,500 at auction in Paris because Karl Lagerfeld perched some specs on it, painted fingerless gloves and attached what I thought was a pharaoh's postiche but is actually a very rakish plastic tie with a symmetrical windsor knot. Bully. READ MORE
Emily Gould reads two books about love so you don't have to-the Christina Nehring brief history of romance and Julie Metz's crazy memoir. WARNING: the Metz book contains the sentence "I creamed the lacy panties I had bought for the occasion." Wow. | November 30, 2009
An Ohio man who claimed to hate Christmas is being sought in connection with the robbery of a Salvation Army bell-ringer. The man apparently stole the bell-ringer's kettle full of charitable contributions. This is a horrible story! It is the Christmas season! The Salvation Army was going to use that money to not hire gays or pay domestic partnership benefits. What is wrong with the world? | November 30, 2009
Here are two excellent explainy-type pieces about issues you may want clarification of: Neal Ungerleider fills you in on the Dubai debt crisis, while Alex Pareene looks at the climate change "scandal" that has so many on the right wetting their pants with joyful indignation (and, metaphorically, semen). Now you know! | November 30, 2009
'Time': Overlooking the Cat Photo Market Again
How many people do you think were at the store or newsstand or whatever and were like, A GALLERY OF RESCUED FIGHTING DOGS? HERE IS MY $4.95! (In your answers, please graph that alongside the number of people who were excited because, like, JOE KLEIN SAID SOMETHING?)
