63–37, the Senate approved Elena Kagan, who is either a SECRET MARXIST LESBIAN or a PRO-CORPORATE IVY LEAGUE POLICY WONK TOADY, to the Supreme Court. Both sides, however, can agree that she is suspiciously childless, and overly devoted to her work. Her duties will include not having to hear the Prop 8 case when the Supreme Court denies cert.

by Paige Ferrari

AKB48, the 48-girl pop group named after Tokyo’s legendary nerd quarter, Akihabara, is big in Japan. Like, ridiculously huge, Justin Bieber in a Miley-Cyrus-Taylor Momsen sandwich big.

Naturally, they’re looking to expand globally.

“The era of imitating the West is over. Now we export Japanese culture,” said proud AKB48 creator/producer/svengali Yasushi Akimoto earlier this year. In addition to arranging a U.S. release for the group’s latest album, he told the Yomiuri Shimbun he’s entertaining offers to build similar girl groups in Thailand, China, Taiwan and Italy.

Many people in Japan consider Akimoto to be a musical genius. In actuality, he’s a marketing genius using a straightforward formula: teenage girls, modified schoolgirl uniforms, and dance routines that evoke both innocence and availability. It’s the happy Lolita aesthetic, which either totally squicks you out or makes you a really big fan of Japanese pop culture.

Akimoto started AKB48 in 2005 with the concept “idols you can meet.” The original target audience was the young, male, anime-obsessed otakus, who might otherwise be spending their money getting foot massages in one of Akihabara’s numerous cosplay cafes. Soon, AKBOta, as the superfans came to be called, were lining up outside the group’s theater to catch daily performances.

AKB48 is so popular in Tokyo it has spawned offshoots: SKE48, based in Nagoya, and and, most recently, NMB48 in Osaka. There’s also SDN48, a more adult-oriented group where all the girls are 20+. (The girls in AKB proper range from 15 to 24, with most of the girls being in their late teens.)

The group is divided into teams A, K, and B, with team captains presiding over each. Fans vote on who will be the “front” girls. Beyond that, the elements are simple: syrupy pop music, face-time with fans (handshaking events are part of AKB48 duties), and pretty young girls. Busloads of them.

Mr. Akimoto’s real genius is knowing the power of numbers. Keeping the group big is important. In addition to making promotional duties a breeze, it prevents individual members from becoming too famous and, thus, inaccessible or… perhaps, more importantly, irreplaceable. AKB48 may be the biggest female pop act in Japan, but-except for a few standout names-most of its members are only vaguely well-known. The girls also “graduate” as they age, or can be shuffled between teams or even sent back to the “research student” farm leagues, meaning, for most members, the ride won’t last much longer than high school. This Menudo-style endless churning of talent makes AKB48 the antithesis of other manufactured girl groups like, say, the Spice Girls, where-at some point-freshness is traded for nostalgia or, as Liz Lemon would say, members insist on clinging to youth and fame with their Gollum arms.

AKB48 members are also expected to cultivate extremely clean, girl-next-door images. This is in keeping with Japan’s ideal of the seijun-ha aidoru, or “pure idol.” In Japan, teen pop idols are expected to project an image of sweetness, positivity, and-most importantly-extreme purity. (We’re talking the kind of just-floated-in-on-a-cotton-candy-cloud level of sweetness and purity that, comparatively, makes Dakota Fanning look like a foulmouthed little slag.)

AKB48 members may pose in bikinis for fan magazines, or wrestle in lingerie in the occasional music video, but on their individual blogs, members switch to kid-sister mode, acting even younger than their stated ages, clutching teddy bears in webcam photos and breathlessly pledging to work harder for the fans.

Of course, as AKB48 members start to age and the alumni pool builds, it’s getting harder to keep everyone on-message.

Last month, fanblogs declared a state of “net turmoil” over the news that 22-year-old Rina Nakanishi, a recent Team A graduate, had changed her name to Riko Yamaguchi, shaved two years off her age, and launched a new career in AV, or porn.

“Really, AV!? wrote one fan on a Japanese blog. “Looking back at her time in AKB48, the image gap is so shocking. Even more than the other girls, she seemed so serious. “ Another expressed familial concern over Rina’s well-known lower back problems during her time with AKB48, worrying that her new line of work might exacerbate the issue.

Over on 2chan, (the Japanese big brother to 4chan) the otaku set ogled topless photos of Rina-turned-Riko, and engaged in a debate about whether or not she would use condoms in her debut, and how that decision would affect what remained of her AKB idol purity.

A few English fanblogs took a more cynical view, seeming to think that porn was a logical career move, seeing as Rina had already successfully cultivated a fanbase with lust in their hearts. One noted, with disgust, that Rina was receiving more attention now than she ever had as a squeaky-clean cog in the AKB machine: “The prospect of watching her squealing with feigned pleasure nude is unsurprisingly rather more enticing to idol fans than watching her squealing with feigned pleasure whilst bouncing around an Akihabara stage.”

Paige Ferrari lives in Tokyo.

Beachgoer: “It’s going to kill us. It’s gonna kill you and then it’s gonna kill me. He’s gonna kill us.”

Surfer: “Just be glad it’s all right.”

Beachgoer: “It’s gonna jump.”

Surfer: “Make up your mind. Is it going to jump, or is it gonna kill us?

Beachgoer: “First it’s gonna jump. And then it’s gonna kill us.”

Surfer: “Will you just relax, mon? It’s not gonna kill us. My father is a television repairman. He’s got all kinds of tools. We can save this shark.”

Beachgoer: “We can’t save this shark, man.”

Surfer: “We can save it.”

(Unfortunately the shark died the next day.)

“On the rare chance you do find yourself or a loved one clenched in the teeth of a crocodilian, experts say fight with all your might. ‘Smack them and punch them in the nose, eyes, and head, and fight them with everything you have,’ said Todd Hardwick, owner of the Pesky Critters trapping program. ‘Most of the time they’ll let go and move off.’ And remember, experts say, crocs and alligators are just trying to do their part for the ecosystem. ‘Crocodilians are top-level predators. They keep other populations healthy by stopping them from overpopulating,’ said Hord.”
–Discovery reporter Julienne Gage reveals her preference for alligators and crocodiles over humans in an interesting article about how those animals present a greater danger to us than sharks. The article also raises the question of whether it would be better to be eaten by an alligator or crushed by a falling vending machine, which, THAT WOULDN’T EVEN BE A PROBLEM IF THEY’D MAKE IT SO THE FUNNY BONES WRAPPERS WOULDN’T CATCH ON THOSE STUPID COILS!!!

A woman in south London called her local council out of concern that a lot in which she parked her car might be haunted after finding that her vehicle had “moved of its own accord.” Surveillance cameras later revealed that she had forgotten to apply her handbrake.

This morning, singer and songwriter Wyclef Jean announced in an hour-long radio show that he’d file papers by Saturday to run in the Haiti election, to be held in November. (Candidates will be deemed to “qualify” on Aug. 17.) Yes, the election for president. Of the country.

In an earlier interview in Time, he blamed his candidacy on the kids:

“My decision was a draft — I’m being drafted by the youth, meaning that, as a Haitian citizen, if I’m to just stand back for another five years, for everything that I stand up [for] and just watch this country get toppled, after going on the ground picking up bodies — dead bodies of kids — then I won’t be able to sleep at night.”

And then he referred to himself as a modern-day Toussaint L’ouverture:

“I say, well, as a modern-day Toussaint L’ouverture, if he was here today, what he would say is: dual citizenship for all Haitians that have left the country. And they should have a seat within the voting because they are the ones that are holding up the Haitian economy.”

Sure. Organizing a slave revolt of thousands. It’s just like buying and abandoning a $2-million dollar house (that’s still sitting there abandoned, by the way).

Every few days something truly insane comes along and reminds us all what the internet is for: pornography and videos of animals acting like people. So, thanks to the fine folks at Urlesque, here’s a clip of a chimp in Japan playing baseball. Knowing what we do about Japanese television, this is either from their “Frontline” or their “Fox and Friends.”

In unrelated Japanese baseball news, there is this amazing clip, which, sadly, has no chimps, but is still pretty cool if you like baseball.

“Mr. Dogg is Angry at the Prospect of Sharing His Alcoholic Beverage”: The Secretive Heroes of Wikipedia

by Aaron Lefkove

At 5:12 p.m. on July 10, 2010, substantial changes were made to the Wikipedia entry for DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince’s 1988 hit “Parents Just Don’t Understand.”

User Ernestp altered the song’s summary with his interpretation of the song’s narrative.

The Fresh Prince begins by expounding on the universal inability of parents to understand their children, suggesting that neither time nor location would make a difference in parents recognizing a child’s potential to err. He suggests, however, that it is incumbent on children to recognize the dimwittedness of adults and just accept this as a given.

Ernestp then takes us through the song’s many hijinks, which include an overbearing mother, a stolen Porsche, and a 12-year-old runaway; not the kind of good, clean, wholesome fun audiences have come to expect from Will Smith, star of such movies as Men In Black, Men In Black II, Hitch, and The Pursuit of Happiness.

The change was met with little to no fanfare and Ernestp closed up his user account a short time later.

Earlier this week a link to the Wikipedia synopsis of the 1994 Warren G and Nate Dogg hit “Regulate,” from the “Above The Rim” soundtrack, bounced around the internet. The summary gives a shot-by-shot breakdown of two young thugs out on an all night sex, drug, homicide and gambling romp. The entry also provides a great summation of the “G-Funk” sound, a style of music that sits comfortably at the nexus of mid-period Parliament and Michael McDonald’s solo 80s output, wherein rhythm, bass, and treble elements are all interchangeable. The description is dry and academic in tone and, the more times you read it, riddled with condescending and likely ironic latent racism. Or, as one acquaintance prefaced it when forwarding the link, “it’s written in language white people can understand.”

On a cool, clear night (typical to Southern California) Warren G travels through his neighborhood, searching for women with whom he might initiate sexual intercourse. He has chosen to engage in this pursuit alone.

Nate Dogg, having just arrived in Long Beach, seeks Warren. On his way to find Warren, Nate passes a car full of women who are excited to see him. Regardless, he insists to the women that there is no cause for excitement.

Warren makes a left turn at 21st Street and Lewis Ave, in the East Hill/Salt Lake neighborhood, where he sees a group of young men enjoying a game of dice together. He parks his car and greets them. He is excited to find people to play with, but to his chagrin, he discovers they intend to relieve him of his material possessions. Once the hopeful robbers reveal their firearms, Warren realizes he is in a less than favorable predicament.

The story unfolds and Nate Dogg and Warren G navigate themselves out of trouble and into the arms of a harem awaiting their arrival at the East Side Motel. This song too appears to have been written by Ernestp, with a host of other users both registered and anonymous jumping on board to add their own tweaks.

Both entries are part of WikiProject Songs, “a collaborative effort to improve the coverage of songs on Wikipedia.” Likewise both have sparked responses from the Wiki community at large, ranging from amused props to outrage and incredulity that such filth ever be allowed to penetrate their hallowed halls. The site has long been a bastion for hilarity, some intentional — the pithy one line descriptions of a dozen nearly identical Jandek album covers, the highly detailed biography of one “Ernst Choukula [who] was born the third child to Estonian landowers in the late autumn of 1873,” and who eventually dies “penniless and alone, having descended into a type of brain-madness” after his exploitation at the hands of General Peter Mills-and some that are totally in earnest. And these descriptions of hip hop classics were obviously written with the intent to provoke laughter.

Bits and pieces of straightforward recountings of hip hop classics already pop up sporadically on the site. Take for example this brief description of Ice Cube’s “It Was a Good Day”:

Throughout the song [Ice Cube] enjoys playing basketball, having sex, smoking marijuana (significantly, the song is 4:20 in length), getting drunk, going to his friend Short Dog’s house to watch Yo! MTV Raps and later win at Craps and Bones, eating fast food at 2 A.M., and cruising the streets of South Central undisturbed. He even sees the lights on the Goodyear blimp, which Ice Cube says it reads, “Ice Cube’s a Pimp.”

Two is funny but three is a trend piece and further digging unearthed an even earlier entry, this one for the Deth Row classic “Gin & Juice” from Snoop Doggy Dogg’s debut album “Doggystyle.” However, unlike the more recent two, a close examination of the changes made dating all the way back to 2005 offered no clues as to who authored this one. The entry, which does not pay as careful attention to detail, reads like a prototype of the style perfected with last month’s contributions. To wit:

We are introduced to the narrator, Snoop Dogg, as he discusses the difficulties of his life. He drives to his home at 2 AM. There is a house party at his home, as his wife is away.

Two lesbian women are copulating in his living room, and intend to do so for the next four hours. Naturally, Mr. Dogg and his associates decide to join the lesbian women. They present condoms to the lesbian ladies before turning off the lights and shutting the doors behind them.

Having a crisis of conscience, Snoop Dogg and his associates become racked with guilt, and decide to take the edge off by smoking one ounce of marijuana.

In the end nothing is resolved, as “It seems that the reason Mr. Dogg cannot commit to a long-term relationship is due to his preoccupation with driving under the influence while continuing to contemplate his finances.”

Since their popularity, neither Ernestp nor any new entries have surfaced-records show that only two entries were made from that account-and so rap fans and those who spend their time trawling Wikipedia’s vast archive are left only to wonder when this midnight marauder will strike again-and which Golden Age classic is next. Will we find out what happens by the time Chuck D arrives in Arizona? Does LL ever find true love with that around the way girl? Is a clear and concise explanation of PSK and what exactly it means somewhere on the horizon?

Aaron Lefkove would most like to be remembered as the guy who coined the phrase “Summer of Megadeth.”

Wu-Tang Clan founder the RZA always sounds like he has cotton balls stuffed in nostrils. But in a good way. He also always has something interesting to say. Here, in a snippet from an interview he did at last weekend’s Splash! Festival in Germany, he talks about how sometimes dictatorship is better than democracy. The interviewer starts to look a little nervous. Now here’s a video mash-up that makes it look Adolf Hitler is performing Notorious B.I.G.’s “Live Freestyle ‘95.”

Real America: Target Doesn’t Support Gay Equality Because It Never Did (UPDATE: Yes, Target and Prop 8, Maybe)

by Abe Sauer

A full-page ad shook up the Vikings preseason coverage in last Sunday’s Minneapolis Star Tribune. Paid for by the Human Rights Campaign (HRC), it demanded Target and Best Buy “make it right” after donating hundreds of thousands of dollars to the MN Forward, the conservative political action committee. That PAC directly supports Minnesota candidate for governor Tom Emmer, a politician with a track record for anti-gay activism and who, amongst other things, proposes shutting down Minnesota’s Department of Human Rights.

Jumping aboard, MoveOn.org launched a petition calling for 150,000 consumers to commit to a boycott. While welcomed by many, there is reason to be wary of MoveOn.org’s particular involvement. For starters, its statement reads “If we don’t push back hard, this will just be the tip of the iceberg. Other corporations will learn that they can pour money into elections to buy the outcome they want.” It essentially lessens the anti-gay rights part of the Target donation outrage in exchange for a focus on a larger battle about the post-Citizens United campaigning world… one in which MoveOn.org’s side benefits greatly. Some, like me, might use a stronger word than “lamentable” to characterize MoveOn’s failure to even once use the term “gay” in its petition.

The HRC stiffened its lip though, telling us, “MoveOn’s advocacy is very much welcomed in this issue as it demonstrates how Target and Best Buy’s contributions have turned off a wide swath of fair-minded Americans.”

And what of the gay-rights friendly brand names attached to Target? Of Target’s more progressive brand partners we reached, including Justin Timberlake and Ben & Jerry’s (both having just signed exclusive deals with the retailer), none cared to specifically comment.

But that’s okay, because Target commented for them, telling us, “Per you questions about our designer partnerships, our partners understand Target’s commitment to inclusion and diversity has not waivered [sic] and remains a core value of the company. Target has a history of supporting organizations and candidates, on both sides of the aisle, who seek to advance policies aligned with our business objectives, such as job creation and economic growth.”

For his part, Emmer has continued to display his characteristic lack of self-awareness by saying of the Target outrage, “The sad part to me is, I thought we were supposed to be able to exercise our rights of free speech.” Meanwhile, conservative blogs circled the wagons and lashed out, calling the Target story “astroturfing.”

When we contacted Mitch Berg, he of the Astroturfing claim and a radio host for conservative talk Northern Alliance Radio Network, to ask if he thought our coverage was such, he said The Awl was “party to some really cynical astroturfing.”

Berg then went on to say that the Democratic-led Minnesota legislature had “done *nothing* to advance any shred of the “gay agenda,’” and that he was “waiting for the HRC to ask [Dem candidiates] Dayton, Kelliher and Entenza what they think about gay rights.” When I pointed out that Dayton and Kelliher have the need for gay equality listed in the issue sections of their websites and that the legislature’s recent gay equality bill was vetoed by Governor Pawlenty, Berg answered, “Whatever. I don’t follow gay issues closely.”

He closed with, “You’re in my spam filter now.”

That Target has stopped including its perfect HRC Corporate Equality Index rankings in its official statements goes without saying. The larger question is, when, and if, Target will go beyond its vague reply to HRC, promising, “At Target, we listen to our guests, our team members and our communities-and we have heard them on this issue. We are committed to doing better and regret that we have let down our team members and guests. We are evaluating ways to make sure they know the high value we place on our relationships with them.”

Best Buy, meanwhile, has curled up with its perfect CEI rating and is keeping its head down in the foxhole, happy to let Target take the brunt of the PR onslaught.

HRC told us it will not set a deadline for Target and that “Every day that goes by, fair-minded consumers are wondering when Target and Best Buy plan to recognize that equality is good business. Their leadership on LGBT workplace issues will continue to be compromised until they make it right.” The organization also said it will not commit to knocking down Target’s perfect CEI rating, though it will also not take that off the table. With the challenge, HRC has at least shown a bit of balls. Yet, there are risks. If Target does nothing and Target’s CEI remains 100 percent, it’s hard to see how HRC’s ratings system would become even more meaningless. HRC claims over 100,000 have signed its petition (nearly 35,000 of those identify themselves as “straight allies”).

A couple hundred thousand people who can be bothered to fill in a form on the Internet is a far cry from an actual dent to Target’s bottom line. The retailer is likely unfazed and hoping to ride out the storm. Target same store sales for July are actually up 2 percent, though that misses forecasts. And the storm shows signs of early exhaustion, even within the gay community. Met early on with near-uniform indignation, the repeated reports are now met with some dismissive humor. Queerty, a gay issues and news blog, which has been on top of the Target news, is now seeing comments on its Target posts such as “I guess I was crazy to think Queerty could go 3 hours without another Target article.”

The truth is not that Target and its leadership have suddenly turned on their commitment to gay rights. It’s more that it never really existed to begin with. Further research shows that Target has funneled significant funding to the most socially conservative of Republicans and that it boasts a frightening culture of anti-gay candidate support from Target’s own stable of top executives.

We have already noted that CEO Gregg Steinhafel and his wife both maxed out their personal contributions this year to Michele Bachmann and Tom Emmer. But Steinhafel is just the captain of the crew.

Target’s current group of top corporate officers have supported a murderers row of anti-gay politicians. Even more confusing, some of those anti-gay candidates supported by Target’s PAC and its executives don’t even represent Minnesota.

Of the small handful of donations he’s made, Target CFO Douglas Scovanner has given to both Rep. John Kline and Rep. Erik Paulson. John Kline joined Bachmann with a group of Republican members of Congress who put their names on a lawsuit to force the District of Columbia to put gay marriage to a Prop 8-like referendum. Meanwhile, Paulson supports amending the constitution to ban gay equality.

Of the five candidates to whom Target CMO Michael Francis has donated, three are George W. Bush and the aforementioned John Kline and Erik Paulson. Target’s Chief Information Officer Beth Jacob gave her largest personal donation ever to Erik Paulson. John Kline also received money from Terrence Scully, Target’s president of financial services. So did anti-gay amendment-supporter Mitch McConnell, who isn’t even a representative of Minnesota.

John Griffith, Target’s executive vice president of property development, went above and beyond, giving to John Kline, Erik Paulson, Michelle Bachmann, and Mitch McConnell. Griffith’s donation to former Democratic senate candidate Rebecca Yanisch looks out of place until one learns she was a construction company executive and Griffith is a property developer.

All of these executives also gave money to former Minnesota senator Norm Coleman during his much contested 2008 race against Al Franken. Even largely politically inactive Target executives, such as Executive VP of Stores Troy Risch, gave to Coleman in 2008.

Al Franken, who is a very staunch supporter of complete gay equality, received zero dollars from Target executives or the Target PAC. Coleman, meanwhile, supported a constitutional amendment against gay equality.

The noteworthy exception to Target’s corporate leadership class of comprehensive personal support for anti-gay candidates is Jodeen Kozlak, which might be expected as she’s the executive vice president of human resources. Kozlak has only ever supported two candidates, one being Minnesota Democrat Amy Klobuchar. The other… “Coleman For Senate ‘08.”

Steinhafel’s leadership in supporting anti-gay candidates may have come from his predecessor Robert Ulrich, who stepped down as head of Target in 2009. While CEO, Ulrich supported Coleman of course; but he also gave to John Kline, and gave a whopping $13,600 to Michelle Bachman between 2005 and 2009. Ulrich also donated to Mitch McConnell and Richard Burr, a anti-gay constitutional amendment supporter who also voted to ban gays from adopting children. During Ulirch’s Target tenure, he also personally supported David Vitter, who has equated homosexuality with hurricane destruction. Burr and Vitter have nothing to do with Minnesota.

It must be noted that though these donations represent a near hive mind of Target’s self-identified top “corporate officers,” they are, nonetheless, individual and not made on behalf of Target itself. Target’s PAC, Target Citizens Political Forum, is the company’s official giving unit. As CEO, Ulrich sent a personal letter to employees encouraging them to give to the Target Citizens Political Forum PAC.

As one might expect, Target Citizens Political Forum spreads its money around a little bit of everywhere, including, on June 14 of this year, to Michele Bachmann. It’s a donation she probably expected, having received Target PAC money in 2006, 2007 (twice!) and 2008.

Target’s PAC also gave one of its largest donations ever last November to the Freedom First PAC. Despite only being around since last October, Freedom First, founded by outgoing Minnesota Governor Tim Pawlenty, has become very poplar with both the Target company and Target leadership. Target’s official gift to Freedom First is one of only 19 corporate donations received by the PAC. (Best Buy is not one of the 19.) Moreover, nearly all Target’s top executives have given their largest donations to Freedom First, including the aforementioned Douglas Scovanner, Michael Francis, Terrence Scully, John Griffith, Beth Jacob, Gregg Steinhafel (and wife) and Grandpa Ulirch. Executive Vice President of Merchandising Kathryn Tesija even joined the Freedom First giving party. In fact, the only Target top executive absent from Freedom First’s roster is HR VP Jodeen Kozlak.

As one might expect from a PAC that is less than a year old, Freedom First has not yet spread its considerable money around. But as it’s the personal PAC of Tim Pawlenty, who as governor vetoed a bill that would have allowed gays to decide what to do with the remains of a dead domestic partner, its giving is lopsided. Of the 14 total candidates Freedom First has donated to, fully 11 are some of the most aggressively anti-gay candidates currently lawmaking in America. These include those whose anti-gay legislative dreams have already been covered here, such as Erik Paulson, John Paul Kline, Richard Burr and Bachmann. Freedom First has also deemed Tim Burns, Scott Brown and Patrick Toomey worthy, all of who support a constitutional ban on gay equality. Toomey also supported laws banning gay adoption.

Those 11 of 14 that the ironically named Freedom First has supported also include Chuck Grassley, Jon Kyl, Roy Blunt and Rob Portman. All who, in addition to supporting vanilla anti-gay equality measures, have gone so far as to support job discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation.

Just to be clear, Target’s official PAC, and every single one of its executives leaders except one, have given healthily to a PAC that overwhelmingly supports anti-gay candidates, many who do not even represent Minnesota. So it’s confusing when Target’s CEO speaks of “our commitment to diversity, and more specifically, the GLBT community” while at the same time working to ensure that legislative offices nationwide are stocked with lawmakers who would work hardest to destroy the GLBT community.

The contradictions are at their worst when Target and its executive leadership laud the company’s “Domestic Partner Benefits” while at the same time lopsidedly supporting lawmakers like Pawlenty and Burr, who would deny every gay American such domestic partner benefits as adoption and after-life remains decisions. Have Target executives engineered a wide conspiracy to reduce gay equality? No. Is it worth rewarding Target with a better brand image for its support of a few at the cost of all?

A doctor we spoke to recently had an interesting anecdote with regard to what’s currently going on with Target and its seemingly duplicitous support for the gay community.

Earlier this year, The Emily Program, a clinic specializing in the treatment of eating disorders, was given the opportunity to move into an old school in Orono, Minnesota. That just happens to be Target CEO Gregg Steinhafel’s neighborhood. In fact, the old school proposed for the new home for The Emily Program was across from the Target CEO and his lovely wife’s house.

The clinic’s permits and move into the new facility were going smoothly until suddenly, they weren’t. Mayor Jim White, at first a champion of the Emily House proposal, abruptly become more stand-offish about the program. Reports surfaced that Steinhafel had used his considerable clout with the Orono mayor and municipal council to handicap the project.

We reached Dirk Miller, Ph.D., L.P., the executive director of The Emily Program and its founder. He told us, “When we had a gathering to talk with neighbors, address their concerns, and answer questions about what we proposed-Gregg attended and praised us, saying that The Emily Program is ‘doing God’s work.’ I agree-helping people heal from eating disorders and other mental health problems is incredibly important. They deserve access to good care in communities near where they live and in environments that are conducive to healing-like the Orono location.

And so we were shocked and disappointed when Gregg came to two different city council meetings to speak out against our proposed facility-while continuing to assert that he loved and supported our work. It didn’t make any sense and still doesn’t.”

That sounds familiar.

UPDATE: The Associated Press reports this afternoon that Target CEO Gregg Steinhafel has apologized, saying he is “genuinely sorry” his true nature was exposed for the MN Forward donation. Steinhafel said a review process for future donations would be set up, but gave no specifics. He did not say HRC’s demands would be met. Despite the spin that it is some kind of change of policy, he basically just issued another statement, committing nothing new to gay equality. It’s a start; but the thousands and thousands of dollars in the pockets of anti-gay candidates from both himself, Target’s executives and Target’s PAC, remain there.

UPDATE 2: Tonight Jason Linkis at HufPo gets a scoop and drops the bomb. Via Open Secrets, it appears Target did get involved in Prop 8 and favored one side heavily over the other. Below.

Here is the “about us” on Protectmarriage.com: “ProtectMarriage.com, is a broad-based coalition of California families, community leaders, religious leaders, pro-family organizations and individuals from all walks of life who have joined together to support Proposition 8.”

We are trying to establish if these were individual Target employee donations or on behalf of Target Corp, though they are beginning to look like the former. Follow-ups with Target and HRC soon. Update: HuffPo says this is individual donations. Update: And, here’s the official statement from Target: “Target did not, nor has the company ever, knowingly donated to legislation or referendums that aim to undermine equality for all, including Proposition 8 in California. Further, Target’s support of the GLBT community is unwavering, and inclusiveness remains a core value of our company.”

Update 3: Minnesota Public Radio has the full letter from Steinhafel mentioned in the first update. The most important bit is “And later this fall, Target will take a leadership role in bringing together a group of companies and partner organizations for a dialogue focused on diversity and inclusion in the workplace, including GLBT issues,” which likely means they plan to do nothing for the time being.

Update 4: HRC says it isn’t enough: “We appreciate Mr. Steinhafel’s statement to company employees this afternoon but it doesn’t go quite far enough… The promise to evaluate political contributions in the future, while a step in the right direction, is provided without details and does not mitigate their $150,000 supporting an outspoken opponent of equality for LGBT people. Target can still make it right by making equivalent contributions to equality-minded organizations and by making clear the procedure by which they will evaluate potential contributions in the future to include issues of LGBT-equality.” When asked how long it will wait, HRC also told us it will not “speculate about hypotheticals” but that this apology would not cut it.

Update 5: Here’s a cynical prediction for how this is going to play out. Target, sensing that the HRC is now coming under as much fire as itself, is going to stall and hope that criticism falls on HRC for a failure to act after its challenge. Sure, Target has made some vague promise of a review process, but who knows what that means. Is the retailer suggesting it had no review process for political donations to begin with? In the meantime, many of the candidates Target and its leadership have supported are working hard to block the post-Citizens United Disclosure Act, without which Target’s future political influence will be even more difficult to track. How convenient.

Would Target even care at this point if it lost points from its 100 percent HRC CEI ranking, something that it seems was purely for Target’s PR uses anyway? The damage has been done. After the exposure of its legacy of support for anti-gay politicians, the retailer now turns up on the first page of results for the Google search “ant-gay.” It the the number one result for the searches “antigay” + “corporation” and “anti-gay” + “retailer.” Why on God’s green earth would Target now act to maintain its perfect CEI rating when, by HRC’s inaction, that rating doesn’t even carry the weight it once did?

Abe Sauer does think that people outside Minnesota will care.