Why Does Everyone Have More Friends Than You?

Here’s the reason nobody loves you.

All these people are having a better time than you and they’re going to tell you about it on Facebook and Instagram.

Have you ever wondered why it seems as if “the people you follow on social media are more popular and active than you are?” Well, Science wondered too, and it turns out there’s a very logical explanation:

Other people are better than you.

There is also something about how your friends are more likely to have more friends than you because you are a sad, irredeemable loser who measures your own sorry state against the social media personas of others and you have somehow deluded yourself into thinking that, just because someone is tweeting thirty times a day about how great the new restaurant he just ate at was or her excited approval of the latest episode of a television show that lots of other people watch, their lives are somehow more full and better-lived than your own, even though the painful desperation that results in a constant need to broadcast the most quotidian details of existence for the approval of others should clearly cause you to pity these people rather than compare yourself negatively to them. The fact that this is indeed how you sort out your self-esteem does lend credence to the study’s conclusion that “you suck so bad oh my God why would anyone ever want to be around you?”

Learn more here, including how “a large fraction of individuals can experience the generalized friendship paradox even in the absence of a significant correlation between degrees and attributes,” which is a nice way of reminding you that there are tons of people who are just as pathetic as you are. Although even they probably have more friends than you do, because you’re just really a drag to be around. Seriously. It makes me sad just thinking about it. No wonder you never get liked or shared.

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