Rich People Safe; 'Revolution' Just Means Marketing and Tech Crap Again

Remember before the idiots were talking about bacon on the internet all the time, they were talking about pancakes?

When the Arab Spring began jumping from country to country a couple of years ago, it seemed like a good idea to add a “revolution” section to my Google News page. During the Occupy Wall Street protests, it continued to provide interesting news about social unrest and nervous rich people hiring extra security. How is the Revolution section faring today, now that it’s okay to be horribly rich again and Jeffrey Skilling is looking at an early release from federal prison?

  • “Get three free meals at IHOP valued at $7.99 each when you join the chain’s Pancake Revolution e-mail club. Sign up and pick your favorite location and you’ll get a email coupon for a free meal of whatever you choose.” — Sun-Sentinel
  • “Tiny technology could spark revolution in house buying: The endless ranks of estate agents’ signs peppering towns and cities across the country could be a thing of the past thanks to scientists at Plymouth University.” —
  • “Is a fresh pasta revolution near? Way down at the end of the piece we learn that there’s potentially a huge productivity revolution in the works here: ‘Ninety-seven percent of the restaurant industry wouldn’t consider having a pasta machine, because they buy prepared pasta, or they seem intimidated by the machine,’ he said, ‘but they all have a Hobart,’ referring to the burly commercial mixer.” — Daily Freeman

So what does revolution mean today? Pancake marketing, reducing For Sale signs in nice neighborhoods, and exploiting factory workers for more productivity in the manufacture of high-end pasta machines.