Here is a video of the famous langur monkeys that have been deployed to patrol next week’s Commonwealth Games in New Delhi. They look pretty effective. But, as the broadcaster from Sri Lanka’s ITN news channel notes, “It’s doubtful if Olympic officials will be considering a similar approach for the London 2012 Games.” He’s right. Monkeys won’t work in London. The problems there will have to be solved by recruiting bigger, drunker yobs than the normal drunken yobs-langur yobs, if you will-and arming them with even sharper shards of broken glass.