Stocks are plummeting! The Dow has dropped below 10,000! But why? Today we’re going with “fears of a global economic slowdown” and “tensions ris[ing] on the Korean peninsula.” I bet the oil slick is happy to finally not be blamed for something. Although looking at these pictures is a lot more upsetting than worrying about imaginary numbers falling under some arbitrary threshold. Anyway, if you’ve got anything left under your mattress, keep an eye on it.