On The Complete Glossary of Hipster Hallmarks
What, no "quinoa-eating"?
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On Mistakes Made
Note to Sandy: A day late and a dollar short.
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On The Honeyed Light, The Magic, The Majesty, The Endless Boredom: Terrence Malick's "To the Wonder"
I love movies, but Terrence Malick hasn't made a watchable one since Badlands. (Days of Heaven was almost watchable, but not quite.) I would rather have a root canal than see this movie, despite the Bardem and the Kurylenko. This was hilarious. You just have to look at Malick's photograph on IMDB, and you'll say: "Oh -- he's THAT guy."
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On How Did 'Forrest Gump' Ever Beat Out 'Pulp Fiction' For Best Picture?
"Right, and after Forrest savagely beats that dude, he says the worst thing a man can say about his tendency toward violent sexual jealousy: "I can't help it. I love you." Not okay, Forrest Gump."
To be sure, you are right in describing a general rule of sexualpolitik. However, in FG, the guy WAS a sleaze, and Forrest DID truly love her, and so it was RIGHT that he savagely beat the guy. That's emblematic of what is kind of genius about the movie. By showing a situation where the stereotypes are, in fact, right, but only because all the characters involved are utterly wacko/mentally challenged, it slyly posits that such behavior is NOT O.K. This obviously sailed over your heads. 'Aughts hipster ironists are condemned to have a hard time with Gump.
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On The Terror Of "Twin Peaks": His Name Is BOB
I never buy DVDs, but when the DVD boxed set of TP came out, I purchased it immediately. Best broadcast television ever. How's Annie?
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On ABC Making Me Go Cold Turkey On Krysten Ritter
If you really like Krysten Ritter, watching her entire character arc on Breaking Bad might be the worst thing you could do.
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On Modern Love: A (Likely!) Statistical Breakdown Of The Weekly 'New York Times' Column
I thought for sure that this would include a breakdown by "present city of residence of author of column." There was a time that it seemed to skew heavily towards Portland; now, it's more ecumenical.
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On "The Thetan Templar," A New Novel By Dan Brown
I just clicked "READ MORE" to say that I don't want to read more.
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On Why Does the 'New Yorker' Hate David O. Russell?
And when Russell DOES that next film you recommend for him, he'll already have Jacki Weaver on board! Win-win!
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On An Entire Human Life Cycle As Dictated By Quora's Recommendation Algorithm
I don't WANT to sign in with fucking Facebook. Has Zuckerberg gotten to you people too? Jesus-fucking-Christ on a pogo stick