On How to Blow Through Airport Security for Only $100
The entire post-9/11 security apparatus needs to be completely dismantled. No TSA, no Department of Homeland Security, no metal detectors, no domestic surveillance, no dingbat sting operations, no more multi-agency meetings on PreCheck system design. I'm not scared of shit. Tear it all down.
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On Now No One Is Up: Web's Champ Porno Pervo Finally Ceases and Desists
He should use some of this free time he has now to get the professional help he needs. And maybe sign up for an English class at a local community college.
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On Man Storms Off Internet: Goodbye, Chris Jones!
Yikes! I hope the internet can find somebody to fill this position. Surely there was a plan in place in case something like this ever happened? I mean, it's not like you can just click around and find this personality just anywhere out there. On the internet. Or the world. Or whatever.
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On Bruce Springsteen Albums, In Order
I've listened to Springsteen's music so closely over the years that I'm always sort of amazed that anybody else has heard of him.
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On The Story of Sushi
Another delicious, healthy, environmentally friendly option: don't eat fish.
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On Obama Busts Smugglers
As with so many other Obama-related news items, I can't help but think that with a President McCain this lucky bit of happenstance would have turned into a fiasco of shockingly catastophic proportions.
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On Why 'Someone Like You' Makes You Cry
This piece is straight out of Gullliver's Travels, the satirical scene of the professor who is building a machine to squeeze sunshine out of cucumbers. WSJ science reporting, always good for a laugh. They are mightily impressed by scientists who want to locate where emotion lives in a pop song, but scientists who study the earth's climate? Not so much.
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On What To Do When The Wolves Are After You
This tactic works with globalism too.
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On Do You Suffer From Lapham's Disease?
I went to one of Lapham's readings many years ago and somebody asked him about DFW, who was beginning to enjoy a meteoric reputation at the time. Lapham looked down and smiled, looked up and sort of gestured vaguely and said, "Well…" and looked down again and smiled.
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On Chef Listens To Unappetizing Music
Quite honestly, I don't see how anybody can hope to do excellent work if they're not listening to Tool.