I believe Billy Strayhorn would like a word with you.
" I don't know why we don't use umbrellas for snow as we do for rain ..."
Because snow, particularly when it's well below freezing, isn't very wet.
Speaking as a young-ish (well, almost middle-aged), healthy, not particularly little male, my default position on a train that doesn't have plenty of seats to spare is to stand. This is because a) there very likely is or will be someone else on the train who needs a seat more than I, and b) because I don't want to worry about having to ascertain who that person may or may not be.
No love for "-bag"?
I'd add that while wearing a necktie with short sleeves is probably the least egregious element of this ensemble, it's also highly self-beclowning.
If only there were an American city on the moon.
I try to generally avoid them.
I guess it's Tea Time for Hitler?
It's about 1000 times more shameful to order a "horseradish-infused Absolut vodka mixed with green apple juice, carbonated, and served on draft with a slice of apple that has been sliced on a meat slicer and compressed in a vacuum bag with Campari" than it is to order a LI iced tea.
And it's about 1000 times more shameful to serve an "Applethy" than to order one.
Not that an excuse is ever needed to listen to The Ventures, but I now know what record I'm going to spin while cooking dinner tonight.