Oh Polly. I love this so much.
"In other words, it was exactly like every bad two-year relationship I'd ever had, condensed into two hours. So efficient! After the party, I went home alone and ate a giant bowl of beet soup with some blue cheese on toast. Isn't it romantic?"
I LOVE YOU POLLY.
I wasn't cheated on, but I left my ex-husband around the time J. Lo left Marc Anthony and I kept seeing her be fabulous in the tabloids and imagining she was my sister-in-divorce (important note: with the exception of "Jenny from the Block" and the brief period when I lived in Cambridge and heard amazing stories about Affleck essentially wandering the streets after their break up, I've never been a J. Lo fan, and I was, and remain, far, far less fabulous). @Sara Miller, come to New York, and I will buy you a drink. Or a million drinks. (Also: PROPS for owning a Yaris.)
@sharilyn No-fault divorce is legal in New York now, has been for about a year, so it's not nearly as expensive or onerous as it once was. Glad I stayed in my failing marriage long enough for that to happen!