On Over 260 Pounds? Start Walking
@fattybobatty It is almost as if systemic discrimination against fat people is engrained in the very fibers of society!
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On Over 260 Pounds? Start Walking
If they use the same bikes they use in DC's bikesharing program (same company, so probably) - they're shittily constructed bikes.
Also, there are a fuckton of "obese" people who weigh less than 260.
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On When I Win The Lottery I Am Going To Save All The Manatees
Oh dammit now I gotta worry about the manatees on top of everything else? Fuck that Red Tide shit. Can't we get Jolie down there to clean up the water or something?
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On Does Your Breath Reek Of Gross Fat-Person Obesityness?
Fat people only eat fast food! We are so repulsive that nobody can stand to get near us!
... am I doing this right?
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On You Think Your Skin's So Special
That article made me break out in hives.
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On Man Probably Sorry His Name Causes Confusion
WAIT. BRY RHYMES WITH CHOIRE?!
TAKING MY TOYS AND GOING HOME.
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On Jurassic Park Frog Monster Vomits Up Babies
Speaking of Biblical, couldn't we have gone with something less 10 Plagues-y if we're gonna resurrect something?
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On The Five Worst Kinds of Co-Workers
SEVEN PAGES!? THAT SELF-ABSORBED SHIT GOES ON FOR SEVEN PAGES!? Jesus woman, some of us have jobs we need to do!
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On Sky Mall Kitty: The Best Song About Cats And Sky Mall Ever
It's been over 3 years, and I have to say, this might be my most favorite Awl post. Moreso than Negroni season. Moreso than Balk looking at that woman looking at that baby. Moreso than Jolie's recipes. Moreso than anything. Singing this song to myself while paging through Sky Mall has sometimes had to stand in for Xanax on flights, and IT WORKS. And then it is stuck in my head for a month, and that month is the greatest month I have all year.
I love you, Sky Mall Kitties.