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On Sympathy for the Comcast Rep from Hell

I had to deal with the other hell that is Charter a few years back and they're no better. I wanted to cancel cable television to get satellite and the service rep told me that I needed to admit the reason why I was cancelling was because I couldn't afford it. Otherwise he couldn't disconnect me.
I had fun making that guy cry...lol. Good times.

Posted on August 4, 2014 at 5:40 pm 0

On The Genius Of Joaquin Phoenix And Casey Affleck

I think Kaufman wanting to be a wrestler was a bit more obvious, considering his size. Phoenix's situation is more like Kevin Federline's, or a Vanilla Ice comeback. I agree, it doesn't matter. But damn it all if it isn't as fun as watching someone fall on the subway tracks. Will he make it? Is it curtains for this poor bastard? Wait for it...wait for it.

Posted on September 17, 2010 at 4:34 pm 0

On The Genius Of Joaquin Phoenix And Casey Affleck

I don't buy it. The "hoax," that is. I seriously believe he wanted to be a hip-hop star as much as Keanu Reeves wanted to be a bad-ass bass player or Jennifer Lopez wanted any kind of talent. Phoenix stuck his dick in the water and found out it was way more difficult than he thought, so he gave up. And what a convenient surrender it was. "Surprise! It was a joke. Now where is that pile of scripts I need to sort through?"

The (now fashionably) comparison to Andy Kaufman has GOT to stop, people. If these two sperm-leftovers weren't able to pull off a simple hoax like this convincingly, then they sure as hell wouldn't be smart enough to emulate someone like Kaufman.

I say Phoenix counted his chickens before they hatched. No matter. The good news is that people are morons and have all the attention span of Ozzy Osbourne. They'll forget about this in the time it takes Joaquin to shave the beard and untangle his hair.

Now I'm just waiting for Billy Bob Thornton to come out and admit The Boxmasters was just a giant "performance piece."

We truly are among greatness. Someone shoot me.

Posted on September 17, 2010 at 3:13 pm 0

On Is the Trailer for 'The Shining' the Actual Film?

Ahh...Kubrick still provoking questions well after his death. The mark of a pure genius.

Posted on August 16, 2010 at 4:32 pm 0

On Having an iPhone Doesn't Mean You're Necessarily a Slut

Hey! I'm an architect and I have a Google Nexus One. Although I do admit that I am a hard-core slut who would do a wicker armchair if the lighting was just right, I don't represent the majority of self-respecting architects who work hard every day.

Posted on August 10, 2010 at 4:28 pm 0