OOH! I know this one! Pick me!!
You let him do it anyway because if you do say something you could lose your friend forever (I made that mistake once: I was right, the marriage was a disaster, and I still lost my friend.)
My friends who got married to jerks all got divorced. I didn't need to say anything. You don't either. You can be supportive. Divorce is awful. Divorce with kids is even worse. Being there for when it all fell apart is rough consolation, but still having your friend is worth it.
I think much of what you posted is either out of date or a confusion between cultural and doctrinal Mormonism.
Any time you have a religion like Mormonism that has a lay leadership at the local level you're bound to hear, and possibly internalize, ideas that aren't actually part of the church's dogma.
I was never "indoctrinated" that my best possible future is a housewife and mother to as many children as I could bear.
Have I heard random church members say such things? Sure, but they're people with their own cultural opinions not representing the official church doctrine. And then I flipped them off and told them they were assholes.
Frankly, my mother, who is a professor, is still pissed that I just have a bachelor's degree. It was always expected that I would educate myself as far as possible, that I'd have a career, and then I'd have a family...you know...LIKE EVERYONE ELSE IN THE WORLD. Poseidon's Trident! I'm in my mid-thirties with a couple of rugrats! Could I have had more children? Yes. Did I want anymore? HELL NO. Did the Mormon church tell me to have children? No. Did I decide I wanted to? Yes. Did I make a choice to stop? Yes. LAWS OFF MY BODY ZOMG NORMAL.
It is kind of funny you were a Merry Miss (I'm glad they did away with those silly names) but Sunday school isn't segregated. There are three hours, only one of which is split by gender. The first is the entire congregation (Sacrament Meeting,) the second is Sunday School, which is, for lack of a better term, integrated, but split by age, and then the last hour is split by gender after age 12, with the men going into Young Men/Priesthood and the women into Young Women/Relief Society.
Fundamentally (ha) it all comes down to a lay leadership and cultural differences. Of course you're going to get some level of out-there sexism and misinterpretation of doctrine in isolated or rural communities. Those ideas exist regardless of religion. That doesn't mean it's representative of a church in total. Any time a religion allows any of its members to give sermons or to teach any class, you're going to get people interpreting and spouting things that aren't true. I don't doubt that you heard all kinds of crazy nonsense, that doesn't mean it's doctrine.
Anyway, I've got to get back to my new-fangled career.
@melis I have! She's ginchy!
Good conversation, guys. Like.
But maybe next time if you want to Ask a Mormon, maybe ask a "card-carrying" Mormon? We're here, reading The Awl, just like you.
Well, not "just" like you, I had to ask my husband for permission to use the internets, unlike the rest of you cads and hussies.
I've hated The Little Mermaid since I saw it in the theater. If Ariel doesn't get turned into seafoam, SCREW THAT MOVIE.
@Abe Sauer Word. WORD.
I agree with Joe, this \"former bishop\" has about as much to do with officially representing the church\'s position as the usher at your Lutheran local church represents all Lutherans. My dad\'s a former bishop; he likes Harry Reid and thinks Sharron Angle\\\'s a wacko.
I\'m not surprised that Angle\'s denomination thinks Mormons are a cult (we are!) I am continually surprised that Mormons continue to throw in politically with evangelical christians who hate us. (Guys, they HATE US. They are not our friends! Stop trying to suck up!)
I like Reid more than Angle (because I have not been lobotomized) although I was pissed as Hell with his position on the \"ground-zero\" mosque. Seriously, Harry, did you learn nothing from the Boston temple?
I agree--there's a serious element of mother-worship in Don. Betty never fit the Madonna he'd built in his mind of what his (absent) mother should be. Megan fits the bill. She's uncomplicated, sees him for what he wishes he could be, and is great with the kids. This has DUH written all over it.
And boy, won't it all end badly?
I loved how Roger actually brought up what we've all been saying, Dr. Rapist will die in Vietnam, only to have Joan tell him that that was no way out of the situation. Thanks for the shout-out, Weiner.
I loved Betty sewing--we've never seen her be so domestic, have we? It seems that Betty is the happiest she's ever been.