On The Most Special Victim: Law and Order's Sneaky Attack on Christopher Meloni

Last week I was driving down the Merritt Parkway and hungry and was like "Oh, New Canaan! I think my cousin lived there once?" And then we drove around and around finding no food anywhere. Main Street in Stamford, though! They have good falafel.

This is maybe the most time I ever spent in the area between the Pez Visitor Center and Mamaroneck.

Posted on May 8, 2013 at 1:42 pm 0

On Wham!'s "Last Christmas" Is the Most Horrible Holiday Song Ever Made

485 versions of "Last Christmas" can not be worse than, say, every awful goopy version of "White Christmas." Or "Santa Claus Is Coming To Town." Also, "Little Saint Nick" is worse. And that one where Old Fart McKringle or whoever says "It's the holiday season, so hoop-dee-doo." That's the worst.

Posted on December 20, 2011 at 5:07 pm 0

On The "War" Is "Over"

My favorite part is how "Little Girl Likes Squeezing Her Father's Balls" is the first related story.

Posted on December 15, 2011 at 9:52 am 0

On Water Bad, Drink Bourbon Instead

Wow, I don't think I've ever seen British people spell the word moisturise before. How wrong-looking!

Posted on July 13, 2011 at 9:26 am 0

On Why Emma Watson Really Left Brown

My guess is that she left because she got sick of people constantly snapping when they agreed with something.

Posted on June 9, 2011 at 11:32 am 0

On The Strange, Great History Of Norman Mailer's $2.5 Million Penthouse

This is basically a fourth-hand story, but a crazy uncle of a friend once made up a really elaborate lie about how Norman Mailer used to spend his afternoons outside of his apartment passing out free hot dogs. He called them Mailer's Nailers, and now I cannot think of this man without thinking about hot dogs.

Posted on May 9, 2011 at 2:27 pm 0

On Local Office Manager Stuck in Elevator

I like how "How Do Men Fake Orgasms?" is the first related story.

Posted on March 2, 2011 at 2:41 pm 0

On Massachusetts 2011: The Abstract State

And candlepin bowling. Pond hockey and candlepin bowling.

Posted on December 30, 2010 at 11:52 am 0

On 'Einstein on the Beach' Revival!

Oh, thank god. I saw the headline and feared it was Counting Crows revival time.

Posted on December 7, 2010 at 1:32 pm 0

On Why The Ads For Christmas Engagement Rings Make Me Uncomfortable

I'd appreciate it if more Awl pieces used the "if you like it then you should maybe talk to it instead of putting a ring on it" tag, because that just made me snarf my coffee.

Posted on December 1, 2010 at 9:33 am 0