On No Wonder You Smoke So Much: Your Parents Are Divorced!

Broken home and both my parents are smokers. Thanks for the dark lungs, you jerks!

Posted on March 14, 2013 at 2:04 pm 0

On Ask Polly: My Roommate's Boyfriend Is Twice Our Age And Practically Lives with Us!

@Smedley T If you don't think money makes any person (man or woman) more tolerable, I would like to introduce you to, um, the world. You never had a douchey rich friend you hung out with because they bought an extra round without you having to ask? If the boyfriend were a sweetheart who cooked for the girlfriend and maybe even invited the roommate to take a portion when he stayed over all the freaking time (does he even buy booze or toilet paper?!) then it would be a different story. This guy is an asshole WHO mooches. You CAN be both but a girl with self esteem shouldn't put up with it.

Posted on February 20, 2013 at 2:08 pm 0

On We May Have Just Seeded Life On Mars

So, the plot from Prometheus. Art imitates life, y'all! It's settled.

Posted on September 11, 2012 at 12:57 pm 0

On Is Ryan Harrison the One American Tennis Player We Can Believe In?

@Niko Bellic USTA was definitely trying to create a star, which makes sense given that Young, for all his inconsistency, is charismatic on court. Wasn't there some controversy about him playing on Arthur Ashe stadium a few years ago?

Posted on April 5, 2012 at 2:41 pm 0

On Is Ryan Harrison the One American Tennis Player We Can Believe In?

Squee! I've been waiting to get disappointed by another American tennis player for about 5 years now. This is the first I've heard of Ryan, my hard core tennis spectator days are in a slump currently, but let's hope he's got more than one good stroke in his arsenal [ie: not just a wack 150 mph serve) and doesn't choke at the drop of a hat.

Posted on April 5, 2012 at 2:38 pm 0

On When Your Friend Is Also Your Boss: A Cautionary Tale

@deepomega In my freelance experience (and a few restaurants) I've learned that I can be a come in late, literally everyday, but it doesn't matter cause I'm the best office bitch/entry level assistant they have. Granted, freelancers are not really apart of the office and your attachment to the business is tenuous but this has been my MO ever since grammar school so I'm guessing it applies at most places.

Posted on March 29, 2012 at 3:21 pm 0

On What To Do With The Cabbage That Comes With Shanghai Soup Dumplings

Thanks for the head's up Dave! It's probably a good thing that I view getting soup dumplings as a chore. Going to Joe Shanghai is a bitch (the wait always takes forever and their entrees are not cheap) so that I don't gain 20 lbs but I'll be hitting this place up tomorrow for sure. Also, M Shanghai off the Lorimer stop has great soup dumplings as well!

I always /want/ to eat the cabbage at the bottom, but rarely do cause I don't want to look like a gluttonous fat ass. Your courage to eat even the food decoration is inspiring.

Posted on March 29, 2012 at 3:02 pm 0

On A Short Story from the County Board Meeting in Arlington, VA

@NeonTrotsky I was considering going back to NoVa to work on the 2012 campaign, but I don't think I could take another Republican defense contractor yell at me about "government spending!" in that hot ass summer weather.

Posted on December 14, 2011 at 12:35 pm 0

On 'The Thing' Is A Replicant Sent To Suck All Joy From Monster Movies

@Gef the Talking Mongoose There isn't a movie that exists which I have recommended more than this one, especially after I saw the trailer for this wack remake. Ugh, couldn't they just re-release it and make it 3D like the Lion King?

And yes, it's re-watchability is remarkable.

Posted on October 14, 2011 at 5:25 pm 0

On How To Be Tolerant

Even the softest republican is anti-choice and I am intolerant of that position. I'm not talking about your Cray Crays like Sarah Palin, but your "nice midwestern white ladies" that believe that womens' wombs were touched by jay-sus and you cain't muss with Gawd's Will! Puh-leeze! They don't care about interfering with God's plan when they get cancer do they and they don't care that they treat their bodies like space age garbage disposals, eating every god-damn transfat man has invented.

They talk about freedom and liberty, but somehow THEY have assumed responsibility for my uterus. THEY want to tell ME what I can and can't do with it. My body is a not fully sovereign after all? Seriously, judge me all you want. Call me a slut, dirty, "unworthy of heaven" but let me be a slut in peace! You can worship your tedious bodily function all you fucking want, but I've got a party to go to.

Posted on May 14, 2010 at 4:20 am 0