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KenWheaton

KenWheaton

Novelist, editor, journalist, drunk. Author of The First Annual Grand Prairie Rabbit Festival

By Mr. B on Today You Can Buy Queen Mary I's Secret Trump Card

FROM: Mr. B
TO: jfruh
SUBJ: The term "Old English" and the misuse thereof

Somebody needs a brief lecture up in here, yo.

Posted on May 15, 2013 at 2:13 pm 6

By Ken Layne on Magic Shape-Shifting Jesus Supposedly Arrested On Wrong Night

@KenWheaton I *love* the infancy gospels.

Kids, if you liked Harry Potter, wait 'til you meet Jesus the Weird Young Magician.

Posted on March 22, 2013 at 1:42 pm 1

By hershmire on Regarding The War In Mali: Are Mali's Dogon People Really Aliens From Sirius?

Dogon it.

Posted on January 18, 2013 at 4:33 pm 1

By Leon on Cilantro Dissidents Identified

It must be weird at the big genetics conference or whatever when Sally is all "Oh, I'm trying to find possible markers for a higher risk of cancer" and Donald, while he munches a celery stick tells Dale that he is working on genetic therapy for Alzheimer's, and Robbie is all "I wanna find out why 1 out of 20 assholes don't like my salsa."

Posted on May 16, 2012 at 12:00 pm 6

By stuffisthings on The Videogame Artiste

I just checked my calendar, and it's still 2012. How does The Atlantic justify sending a writer who clearly knows fuck all about games to interview the World's Most Pretentious Man about how he is going to finally bring intellectual credibility to the biggest sector entertainment industry by making a puzzle game?

Posted on April 12, 2012 at 1:34 pm 3

By Daniel Sargeant on Okay, Help: What's Your Ideal Afternoon in Brooklyn for Tourists?

Oh, and bring cash.

Posted on April 11, 2012 at 12:46 pm 1

By Flashman on Six Hours at the Very Bottom of the Ocean

The structural component that prevents the submersible from imploding is James Cameron's ego.

Posted on March 8, 2012 at 11:46 am 2

By deepomega on Bryan Ferry Can't Drink A Wine If It Has An Ugly Label

That's funny. I only drink wine with ugly labels, because it has lower self-esteem and is easier to talk into my mouth.

Posted on October 7, 2011 at 2:54 pm 3

By Clarence Rosario on A Battered Nation Cowers In Fear As Gmail Goes Down

So THAT'S why I haven't seen the newsletter this week?

(oldie, but a goodie)

Posted on September 23, 2011 at 3:29 pm 7

By Kit Traverse on The Best Fried Chicken In The World, Galaxy, Universe

Damn, on my one trip to Charleston, I visited Jestine's, but only for brunch. Need to get back there.

Meanwhile, if you're looking for a fried chicken fix closer to home and don't have the keyboard skills to snag a 'fuku reservation, try Popeye's.

Posted on May 11, 2011 at 1:40 pm 2