On 60 Of Baseball’s Best Names (That Are Not Hunter Pence), In Order

John Dickshot's nickname was "Ugly?" Why that's the most John Dickshot-y thing of all time. Was he a Garbage Pail Kid?

Also, Vida Blue.

Posted on August 16, 2011 at 2:12 pm 2

On NFL Stadium Names in Order of Respectability

Indianapolis is so remarkably average, could you please just bump our ranking down to 15.5? We prefer our mediocrity to be MATHEMATICALLY PRECISE.

Posted on September 23, 2010 at 2:51 pm 0

On So There Was Some Kind Of Health Care Thing That Happened Last Night

That bearded, twitchy gent running the show last night was fucking FIERCE. Who was that?

Posted on March 22, 2010 at 9:56 am 0

On Science Finally Comes Up With Good Use For Human Body

Is that a double-penetration movie on your arm or are you just happy to see me?

Posted on March 9, 2010 at 12:49 pm 0

On Booby-Juice Cheese Does Its Job

This is one of those ideas that will just TAKE OFF in Japan.

Posted on March 9, 2010 at 10:20 am 0

On Jim Bunning's Victims

As Jesus often said, "Tough shit, you lousy layabouts." [Deuteronomy 28:14]

Posted on March 2, 2010 at 11:16 am 0

On Sometimes I'm Happy

Angst ... the healthy, ALL-NATURAL sentence-polisher? Well I'lllllll be. (So long, ether!!!)

Posted on February 26, 2010 at 4:00 pm 0

On How Many Years Will It Take Us To Get John Yoo's Emails?

Melancholy-scrubbing begs to differ. (The secret ingredient is despair!!!)

Posted on February 26, 2010 at 2:52 pm 0

On Half Baked: Snow Day Cookies

The road to Crazyladytown is paved with toffey brickle. And davenports.

Posted on February 26, 2010 at 2:24 pm 0

On Hometown Heroes to Have Difficulty with Proposed Profanity-Free Week in Fucking California

If you play that song in reverse, it's actually Gordon Lightfoot's "Sundown."

Posted on February 25, 2010 at 4:19 pm 0