On William H. Squier, Unknown To The Youth

Way to hire a guy, guy.

Posted on November 19, 2013 at 5:19 pm 0

On What People Contemplating The Man Bun Must Think

Why would I want to look like a samurai or a woman? Because they are both awesome and attractive! Plus regular ponytails make one look like a baby boomer. Like some sort of a Doonesbury lovin' Doobie Brother.

Posted on November 19, 2013 at 4:54 pm 0

On Death To Zombies

I thought zombies were a metaphor for how I want to shoot people and not go to jail.

Posted on June 28, 2013 at 1:48 am 1

On If God Wanted Us To Be Vegans, Why Did He Leave Holes In Vegan Logic?

@carpetblogger I wish I lived in the 3rd world so I wouldn't be burdened with moral dilemmas and philosophy.

Posted on June 21, 2013 at 7:57 pm 3

On Maine Governor Just Trying To Raise Awareness Of Lube

How are politicians not allowed to say that anymore? Unlubed anal sex is the basis of all political metaphors in this country and has been since people actually used vaseline as a lube for anal sex.
And baseball. Unlubed anal sex and baseball.

Posted on June 21, 2013 at 3:33 pm 0

On Or Maybe Bob Benson Is Lloyd... Bentsen, You Ever Think Of That, Nerds?

I'm reading him as a compare and contrast of Joan. The shiny, new model of Joan.

Posted on June 1, 2013 at 3:10 pm 0

On Hair Is Wasted On The Hairful

@j.a.b. I wanted to say something snarky, like that I had no idea that men who shave their hair are bald, but I won't. Because brother's gotta stick together.

Posted on May 7, 2013 at 7:06 pm 0

On Did You Eat The Bones?

@David Like the mighty yeast. We toil so they may live in comfort and we sing their praises while drinking their pee.

Posted on May 7, 2013 at 9:46 am 0

On Did You Eat The Bones?

@Kjle Risch A calorie is not a calorie; and no amount if mocking concern will make you not an animal. You'd do better to get over your squeamishness and learn to get along with the other animals.

Posted on May 7, 2013 at 9:43 am 1

On Man Finds Album Underwhelming

It's cute that he can't come to accept the possibility that a rock band might have righty political leanings.

Posted on May 6, 2013 at 10:48 pm 0