@Subway Suicide@twitter Totally right. In some way, this kind of over-concern infantilizes women and accomplishes the opposite of whatever "I-get-it-ness" the LW is going for. Women are adults too, yo! Now go out and get yourself some.
People who own their brokenness are far and away the most interesting folks around. LW, your LIFE is your barnstorming first novel. Even though you might not believe it right now, coming as far as you have is a great work in itself. And let me tell you, there's something about being 29 that's FRAUGHT with the feeling that things that haven't even begun for you yet are already all over. It's all okay. You'll be amazed down the road at how it all works out, whatever that means for you.
Man, do I get this. Really beautiful work once again, Polly. When I was in my teens and twenties I also believed that my value in the world solely depended on my sparkling wit and ability to be OKAY I'M OKAY I'M GREAT SERIOUSLY SEE HOW FUNNY AND GREAT I AM? Then I got some therapy and made some truly good friends and began to unwind all the false bravado that hid the hideous monster I called "The Dark Thing." The pendulum took a wide swing for awhile, until I was nothing but a squishy cryface all.the.time. That might happen to you, LW, but it's okay. Sometimes there's no way around the messy work we have to do to become who we really were all along. All the best to you.
@beetnemesis I thought Polly's advice was superhumanly empathetic toward the LW's meathead husband. I would've been on the first plane home and shipped all of hubby's shit to his asshole friend's house. Suffering a stillbirth is a big fucking deal. And you think SHE'S petty and immature? As for "not being gracious to the husband, since it's basically forcing him to choose between them" -- I just. No.