Guacamole is free if you skip the meat(/sofritas)! Veggie salad 4 LIFE.
@Shara I read that book a few months ago after going through a breakup very similar to what the LW is describing. I do recommend it, it was a great read, but sometimes it is really hard to stomach the narrative she presents: that it's not you, it's just that you haven't been lucky to meet the(/a) right guy yet. And there is nothing you can do to change that, or find him. Because while it is sort of liberating to reaffirm that there is not some sort of cheat sheet that's been given to EVERYONE ELSE out there who have managed to navigate the relationship game better than I have ... depending on your priorities in life (ie: babies), you don't necessarily have 12 years to spend waiting around to finally roll doubles.
Sara Eckel gave up kids and ended up finding her right guy and she seems very happy now, which is great. As one of those unfortunate people who is more certain that anything else in life that kids are something I Need To Have in order to be happy with my life, her story honestly made me feel worse. I mean, kids are enough of a priority for me that if it comes down to the wire I'll just bite the bullet and do it on my own, but I hate feeling like finding the right guy before my eggs start to rot might be asking too much of the universe.
(I hate how "wahhh but babies" this sounds and TRUST ME if I had any say in the matter I'd turn off whatever "must reproduce!!!" switch inside me is on hyperdrive because this shit is fucking exhausting, but what can you do ...)
@charlsiekate Hah, I suffer from this affliction too ... I'm certainly not The 1% Hotness, yet physical compliments do almost nothing for me. My appearance is due to the recombination of my parents' genes and a lack of an eating disorder. I'd rather hear compliments on what I'm wearing, or my haircut, or something like that that I actually chose.
Meanwhile, I'm genuinely puzzled when straight guys show non-sexual interest in me. Like, what?? You actually enjoy my personality and don't want to get in my pants too??? I mean, OBVIOUSLY I'm smart and pretty funny and can tell you some interesting stories when I've got a few drinks in me, and I think I'm awesome, but in what realm would anyone else see that as more important than the way I look??