Guy sounds like a dick. End of story.
Wow, this is incredibly odd. I'm not even sure how I feel about it, but I'd say my feelings are mostly negative and 100% confused.
Polly might have already articulated this idea in her post (I read the letter but quickly)but I've found that being more reserved about expressing yourself to a group, especially a new and unknown group, will actually draw people in, because they want to know more. If you're too open and forced about who you are the mystique is gone, taking away opportunities for strangers to attempt more conversation and interactions with you. I'm very shy, although I'd say most people around me would disagree, and I relate a lot to LW. I'm almost 25 and I struggle with making friendships and feel pressured to make myself known to new people as if I need to rush the process of building relationships with people. But over time I've realized that I'm probably not going about it the most productive way.
I'm planning (Well, I've been doing this for awhile, never know if I can really afford it someday) a trip to Iceland and this is really insightful, so thanks.
At my last job I drove from Missouri to Iowa and back about every other day. I noticed how many tobacco, alcohol, and fireworks stores are right there on the border. As a non-smoker it took me awhile to realize how insanely low cigarette prices are here.
I'm shocked the FTC would let a Comcast/Time Warner merger happen. It's going to create a solid monopoly for an enormous amount of the US population. And for anyone who tries to argue that regulation hurts the economy, how does having a monopoly NOT hurt the economy? Not giving consumers a choice, letting them decide who to buy from due to who has the superior product is the sole heart of consumerism, that is stifled by monopolies.
I live in Kansas City, and luckily I have access to Google Fiber, which is a GODSEND compared to living in a small town where one cable/internet company was practically the monopoly. We as customers were treated like the spat-upon ground, blatanly charged illegal fees for "going over" our 70 mb monthly limit and falling mercy to rude, aggressive, and quite frankly, scary employees who installed the services in our home. Unfortunately for Google Fiber, I believe they aren't really making any profit off the business because they offer free internet for anyone who either pays the install fee or already lives in a unit that has the system installed by the landlord or property owner. I believe they could expand into other markets in the US but it will be a very slow burn.
@Sister Administrator No! Which is why it's ridiculous that I would think that way. I think it probably all boils down to an issue with my self-esteem.
This kind of reminds me of myself and my dad. He and I both have this complex where we cannot ask anyone for help or assistance or a favor. Like, it's ripping my heart out to ask someone to drive me to the airport or feed the cats while I'm on vacation. But by God I will do so many favors for other people and I will INSIST on it. I don't get it. I don't understand at all. I've discovered over time that I've developed anxious-attachments with my friends and if they say something or act negative towards me (or that I suspect they are) I feel like I'm walking on eggshells around them until something "proves" to me that it's not an issue anymore and they don't hate me.
This letter and its response is not the exact same issue that I'm talking about but it does remind me that I need to not care so much about this. If people really don't want to be my friend, then we won't be friends. Asking them to help me is not going to make them hate me. They're not bubbling with passive-aggressive anger because I asked them to help me move into a new apartment or criticized something they happen to enjoy that I might not enjoy. I guess my overall shyness and struggle to make and maintain long-term, successful friendships and romantic relationships has sent me into a spiral of emotional chainmail armour and fear of being myself. So, thanks for writing this (both of you) and I will try to remember these ideas.