feeling a lot of sympathy/empathy for our LW. my two cents: look into therapy and start with regular individual therapy, but consider group therapy. support groups are great too, but i'm talking about a therapy group specifically. it's a safe place to play out what happens in your interactions, and as somebody who's also quiet and anxious i can say from experience that it can really help.
this was a really good one, yall. i just wanted to add my voice to the chorus - some guys will say dreamy-sweet things about how wonderful it would be to settle down with you. those guys probably even mean what they're saying, and they're voicing a good feeling and generally endorsing you as a partner. but they can do that and it may have nothing to do with anything that would happen in this actual universe. sometimes the guys (generalizing, but as a straight woman that's my expertise) who do this are the ones who are the most afraid of real commitment. you'd think that they'd see that this is confusing to the women they're with, but they don't really have to figure it out so often they just don't.
now i'll get back to trying not to worry about not being that woman.
as somebody who dated a slightly milder version of LW2's guy, it's my highly unscientific opinion that a disappearing sex drive indicates other negative things. not that it would have to in order to be bad. it really wears you down, more than you might even immediately notice.
thanks so much for this: "just because you're a youngish woman doesn't mean that every fucking jackass in the world has a right to know exactly where you stand on everything."
i like the LW1 advice here, but i want to be a little hair-splitty about the introvert/extrovert thing. dude doesn't need to get over himself and become an extrovert. he needs to get over himself a little and not use the fact that he's an introvert as an excuse to never take risks and never allow himself to be a little on-edge for a while in a challenging social situation.
basically, some people are never going to become really at ease with large groups. but being one of those people doesn't mean you completely avoid large groups either. you can practice and get better at making small talk, and you can also practice being okay with the fact that you're sitting around in a large group feeling kind of dorky.
@ericdeamer maybe i've just read too many things about my town that sounded parodic but were completely serious.
if austin's a cowtown in the middle of nowhere that only recently got decent food, then by all means fuck off and do not ever come here.
in addition to the kid sex, there's the part (if i'm even remembering right and not making it up) where bill is trying to get his wife to wake up from her coma/stupor/catatonia/whatever so he takes her on his special magic kid bike, and then all at once he gets a boner and she wakes up.
i like this, but i think it's still kind of impossible to convey the magic of christeene. you kind of have to actually go to a show before you can understand.
sounds like a migraine to me. kind a gnarly example of aura/prodrome, but well within the range of things that happen all the time.
and if you didn't get a proper headache later that doesn't mean it's not migraine. anyone can get them and they don't work the way everybody thinks they do.