@mmmcheese Definitely agree with @gimluck on this one. I also struggle with depression, but I think there is something to be said for taking responsibility/control over our lives & thought patterns. Each time we stop ourselves as we begin to slip onto those well-worn pathways of negative thinking, it begins to create a new neural pathway in the brain that over time gets more and more well-defined. It is easy for us to feel unloveable (for example) because we have spent so much time practicing it that those are the deepest grooves in our brain, but we have the ability to change that and create NEW grooves, which is awesome! Now I've been practicing feeling certain negative things about myself for 29 years, and have only just begun in recent years to consider my personal power in this way, so those neural pathways of negativity are DEEP! I still find myself falling into old habits, but little by little, it becomes easier to shift to a more loving and hopeful perspective when I'm feeling down. It's slow going, but it works. A meditation teacher once told me that this moment of stopping yourself is enlightenment, and I think he may be right.
I really wanted to be Agent 99 from Get Smart. She had awesome outfits. And I used to look at my Ninja Turtle nightlight every night and wish that I would wake up as Michaelangelo, because he was the funny party dude and obviously the coolest.
Now I think I would want to be Inara from Firefly because Mmmmm Malcolm Reynolds. And she had her own little space ship decked out like an Opium Den! AWESOME!!