On 'Time' Makes Smart Move In Trolling Generation That Does Nothing Else But React On Social Media
Yeah, like they read Time Magazine.
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On Hair Is Wasted On The Hairful
I had been shaving my head for a couple of years when I met a girl who asked me to grow my hair back out. That's when I found out I had gone bald in those two years. I now regret not having enjoyed what little time I had left with my hair.
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On Here Are The Books Repressed People Who Hate Themselves And Others Don't Want Kids To Read This Year
Who do I call to add Dan Brown's "Inferno" to the list? I fucking hate Dan Brown.
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On Hi, What Have You Guys Been Up To?
Did the bad people take away your left margins?
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On The Five Worst Kinds of Co-Workers
I've managed to be a bad coworker when I was single, after I stopped smoking, and despite not having children. I consider this my "having it all."
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On The Titles of Philip K. Dick’s Novels, In Order of Sheer Awesomeness
The artist who made that cover for "Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?" clearly didn't bother to read the book.
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On Two "Black"-Hearted Drinks From Cold, Dark, Faraway Places
Sorry but Hakarl really is by far the vilest thing I've ever eaten. And I've eaten many vile things.
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On What's Up With That Creepy Old Pope Quitting, Anyway?
@Gef the Talking Mongoose I was really hoping to avoid that interpretation of "nailing" but some things are just not possible I guess.
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On What's Up With That Creepy Old Pope Quitting, Anyway?
I know Masaccio is the shit and all, but wouldn't it be easier to nail St. Peter to the cross flat on the ground and then lift him up? Or at least do it standing in front of him instead of nailing from behind? Just sayin'.
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On 43 Things That Will Make You Feel Old
Grey chest hair.