I think tiny hamsters in votive holders are cute. However, I would not advocate using a hamster as a candle.

By petejayhawk on Should You Tweet?

I follow back.

Posted on April 15, 2014 at 1:17 pm 3

By garlicmustardweed on Ask Polly: I'm 33 And Single. What Am I Doing Wrong?

Two or three weeks into dating my now husband, I found out I had an HPV infection. I was incredibly embarrassed, since it was the legacy of condom-less one night stand that I had had two months earlier, before meeting him. I was sure this would ruin everything: I needed to tell this wonderful new boyfriend that we should wait to have sex until the infection cleared. He was uncomfortable when I told him, but he didn't run. He told me that he was, in fact, a mid-twenties virgin, and was therefore, OK with waiting a couple more weeks to have sex. He had been super embarrassed about his inexperience, I had been super embarrassed about my previous sex life. I then also explained, by way of explaining why I was the kind of person that had condom-less one night stands, that I had been in therapy for anxiety and low self esteem. So within a month of dating, it was all out there: I had an STD, I was seeing a shrink, he was a virgin and insecure about sex in general. It should have been a recipe for disaster, but we really, really liked each other. The vulnerability, honesty, and uncomfortable talks we had in the first couple months of dating helped us to have genuine intimacy later on. Our flaws were not incompatibilities, they were just us being imperfect humans. Like you (and Polly) I probably would have tried to keep playing the put-together chill-lady super-woman card for as long as possible, but maybe its a good thing that my hand was forced.

Posted on April 2, 2014 at 1:40 pm 8

By BadUncle on Everything Still Terrible

Will Goop replace Highlights?

Posted on April 2, 2014 at 12:00 pm 2

By pissy elliott on Amazing Weekend For The Gays

of COURSE that picture is on zoe lister-jones' instagram. A+ all around, everybody.

Posted on March 31, 2014 at 9:33 am 1

By KarenUhOh on All That We Have Foreseen Has Come To Pass In Brooklyn

Finnbar is 32.

Posted on March 26, 2014 at 10:23 am 10

By Gef the Talking Mongoose on On Lena, On Rihanna, On Kimye: The Very Necessary Death Of "Vogue"

@hockeymom : Khloe did say to one of the contestants, and I quote,"I honestly want to skin you alive and wear your body" so it may be a whole SERIAL KILLER FAMILY (!!!)

Alternate take : Their dad does give off a sort of Leatherface vibe, but that may just be his leathery face.

Posted on March 24, 2014 at 7:49 pm 1

By whizz_dumb on You Are What You Tweet

pizza guns combination yep despicable drinking guide drivers DUDE dressed band BASEBALL brown catwoman season style commercials danny saturday cat loud bucks mood badass fuck fart deaths dudes OAKLAND beer laugh added dumb tacos pants jokes salad plus intro taste vape butts lyric feminist song

It works.

Posted on March 7, 2014 at 5:24 pm 1

By whizz_dumb on Meet The Awl

Hey Moon, thought you were out of the woods huh? You're still in the cross hairs mutherfucker.

Posted on March 4, 2014 at 12:09 pm 2

By cinetrix on Meet The Awl

Congrats, gentlemen. (Hell, I figured if the other low-number folks were coming out of the woodwork, I should, too.)

Posted on March 4, 2014 at 11:33 am 2

By KarenUhOh on Shh, Nobody Move: The Republicans Are Sane Again!

If by "sane" you mean "shrewd," that'd be the distant rumble of an oncoming election you hear beneath their feet.

Posted on February 24, 2014 at 2:03 pm 4