@Clarence Rosario It's actually all automatically generated by the despairum ipsum machine.
Tell me more about this lunch place that only charges $13 for a salad...
Here's some advice: skip the first 2,500 words of this response and go straight to "see a therapist." You have anxiety so bad you can't succeed personally or professionally? Don't write to a long-winded advice columnist--see a damn therapist.
Also goes for people addicted to steaming episodes of "Daria" for free
Formerly the internet's #1 resource for Foxy Brown rumors and discussion of clafoutis. No idea what happened to it after that.
'I am curious, I'll admit, what kind of "artistic industry" "raises eyebrows."'
Charitable guess: tattoo artist
Uncharitable guess: sandwich artist
But seriously, lady, your parents are assholes. Whether or not you marry this dude is secondary to whether or not you let their twisted priorities and vulgar snobbery dictate your life choices in general. If I were you, I'd tell them to piss off, get engaged to this guy, and set your wedding date 18 months into the future so that you have time to calm your nerves (or not, as the cast may be).
Have you thought of nipping at a hip flask for those 48 hours? Just 'cause they don't serve or condone booze doesn't mean you can't drink it, with a little discretion.
Just don't fill the flask with egg nog because that's disgusting.
@Alex Balk I guess that would explain the completely baffling placement of raw onions above grilled onions, YOU MONSTER
Bacon and avocado are the foundation of any legit chopped salad. The rest is just noise.
Now that is some top-notch ass-kissing right there. An ass-kissticle.