On Remember New Coke?
So, here's the neat thing about the sources for this New Coke conspiracy (according to Wikipedia): They don't seem at first blush to be totally without merit!!!
The two books that mention this theory are The Real Coke, The Real Story by Atlanta business journalist Thomas Oliver and For God, Country and Coca-Cola by Mark Prendergast— the book that (incidentally) revealed to the public the recipe for Coke Classic's secret ingredient 7X. (Prendergast reportedly found it in Coke creator Dr. John Pemberton's laboratory notes.)
Until I look into these books, I'm basically left hoping the story is true because it puts Coca-Cola's byzantine marketing on par with the product launch at the center of David Forster Wallace's Mister Squishy.
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On Ladies That Laugh at "Fat People Falling Down"
@My Number Is My Address No argument here. I'm gonna go speed clean my cubicle to "Yakety Sax" now.
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On Ladies That Laugh at "Fat People Falling Down"
This reminds me of the classic case of Joe Garden flashing his belly at Onion meetings, which week in and week out was the only thing people consistently laughed at ... at least, according to some Washington Post article: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/discussion/2008/11/12/DI2008111202030.html
Comedians, I think, get to a point where they only convulsively laugh at 100% plebeian shit they'd never dare include in their own work or write themselves.
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On Things Chris Jones Wished Women Treated His Semen Like
I was talking recently to a writer friend who complained that commenters never do this, so here it goes:
LOL. That was really funny. Thanks for writing this. #12 especially.
(Seriously)
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On It's the Lowest Moment Yet for Michael Bloomberg
@NeonTrotsky I hope our new Americans Elect president appoints Thomas Friedman Secretary of State.
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On The Goldman Sachs Op-Ed
@My Number Is My Address This is a tangent, but I figured you'd like it.
http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/why-i-am-leaving-the-empire%252c-by-darth-vader-201203145007/
"As an institution gains hegemony, the probability of a satirical article comparing it to the evil galactic empire from Star Wars approaches 1."
(According to a cursory Google, I may get to claim this Godwin's Law corollary.)
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On I Am the World's Worst Sperm Donor
Seriously, though. Semi-colons, people: independent clauses w/o coordinating conjunctions or listed items with internal commas ONLY.
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On I Am the World's Worst Sperm Donor
@myfanwy
While we're all still here, I also saw "Disclosure" recently. Even though I expected to hate it, I thought it was about as good as "Congo." Not nearly as good as "Sphere" or "Jurassic Park."
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On On That Terrible TV Show About Girls Having Sad Sex!
I love that, about 3 hours in, this article is the "most viewed" on the site, but not even remotely close to being the "most commented!"
We need your input, you silent majority of half-asleep, boob-clicking Awl readers!