Parents in the third-largest school district in Colorado are being asked to lay out 50 cents per ride if they want their children to take the bus to and from their learning institutions. The program, which starts next year, will raise about $2 million for the cash-strapped Douglas County School District — which is looking to reduce its annual operating costs by some $31 million after cutting $80 million from its budget over the past four years.

"For the first time in Phillies history, a fan running on the field at Citizens Bank Park was subdued by a Philadelphia police officer using his Taser gun." (And hey, what do you know: It might be the first time in MLB history as well.)

The apartments above the East Village pork purveyor Momofuku Ssam Bar are ready for renting, and yes, they are — like every other new apartment that's come to market in this city in the past too-many years — "luxury"! Which basically means that they look like every other apartment that you might see lately, with the stainless-steel fixtures and the hardwood floors and the price tags for three-bedrooms that run from $5,950 to $7,500 (!). One hopes that the landlord takes off the protective blue plastic on the kitchen fixtures before move-in is final, but one might especially hope that the exhaust-fan system in the place is [...]

Some people wait a year and then beat their tormentors silly in the parking lot in retaliation for dick jokes employed within professional contexts. But if you're as monied and powerful as Cablevision head honcho Jim Dolan, you can go the parking-lot ambush one better, and withhold your ad revenue from the media outlets that torment you — and if you're really steamed, you can get your cronies like the megapromoter Live Nation to join in on the act. The result: "In toto, a mediocre dick joke about a media acquisition has now cost [Village Voice Media] upwards of $1M in yearly advertising revenue." Um, yipes?