April may be the cruelest month, but in terms of life gardening, August is arguably the shittiest. If your garden is anything like ours, it has entered 'the slump,' a demoralizing period when your favorite perennials have already flowered, the conifers are sagging and even the most dependable annuals are riddled with holes from mysterious and seemingly incurable infestations of leaf-munching bugs. While this can be an excellent time to reflect on what went wrong-and if you can afford it and have the space, to order some late-blooming summer bulbs for next year-it can also be an ideal time to say: 'Fuck it, let's go back to Wave Hill!' READ MORE

Plants: our friends? Our enemies? Uncaring monsters who are only interested in screwing everything in sight? Oh wow definitely the latter. Wave Hill (a "public" garden, which means "only eight bucks!") is the pervertedest, sexiest, pollen-iest place in New York City (249th St., hello!). Up there, overlooking the Hudson, you can watch the foreign flora, from near and from really far, basically get on top of the other flora and hump it until it bleeds sap. All over. Actually very sexy and fun to be around! READ MORE