Posts Tagged: The Royal Family
16

The Miraculous Exploits Of Princess Michael Of Kent

A series dedicated to explaining Britain's manufactured celebrities to an American audience.

To the index of woes humanity was blessedly spared last year—the Mayan apocalypse, a Romney-Ryan administration, the fiscal cliff, photos of Kate Winslet’s third wedding—we must add an event whose absence supplies a faint but joyous glimmer of hope in our brutal world. I refer, dear readers, to Her Royal Highness Princess Michael of Kent's fourth literary effort and debut novel, The Queen of Four Kingdoms. This reportedly completed tale of warring royals in 15th-century France, featuring "many colourful and also dangerous characters," has failed to appear despite a promised "release date" of 2012. Now, [...]

23

How Kate Became A Princess

A series dedicated to explaining Britain's manufactured celebrities to an American audience.

Heartbreaking confession time: I was born with a rare condition, of unknown etiology, that causes my skin to break out in hives whenever I see grown women dressed as fairy princesses and throwing around phrases like “my special day” and “beach-themed centerpiece.” Nevertheless, in my dedication to delivering scoops no matter how intrepid the investigation—in this instance, perusing TLC message boards and IMing with a make-up artist named Flavio—I’ve obtained cast-iron confirmation that no bride is permitted to grace any wedding show (“Say Yes To The Dress,” “Bridezilla” et al) without contractually committing to intone, on command and [...]