Well that didn't take too long: Mark Salter has been "officially" fingered as the author of O, the fictionalized, non-sadomasochistic work of fiction about the president, written by someone described by the publisher as someone who "has been in the room with Barack Obama." You remember Mark Salter as the man who writes everything for John McCain. Oh I see. Political ops. The book has been in print for two days. "Trite, implausible and decidedly unfunny," says the New York Times!

MTV Shows

The verdict on last night's "excitement" at the MTV Movie awards: Eh. "Was it staged? Most likely. Eminem is a master pitchmen, and he's used his homophobic tag to move records before (see the Grammys' 2001 performance with Elton John). But if it was planned, Emimen should have stuck around and had more fun with the moment. After all, storming out was the obvious move, and what we'd expect from Em (as is much of 'Relapse')."

Things from England: "Bank Machine, which runs 2,500 ATMs across the country, has set up five cash dispensers in locations from Spittalfields to Barnet that offer customers the option either to request cash in English, or 'moolah for ya sky rocket' in cockney. Ask for cockney and the machine tells you it is 'Readin' your bladder of lard' before asking for your 'Huckleberry Finn'. Then the hard decisions start. Do you want to see your balance on the Charlie Sheen? Or withdraw sausage and mash?" Yep.

Vanity Fair.com's summer intern Thomas Kaplan has been locked in a Conde Nast research closet to watch cable news from 9-5 for four days straight-while being broadcast on the internets. Today, while he alternately sat through CNBC, had lunch with a pretty, young fellow intern, and asked his viewers what celebrities he looks like, he also chatted with me-a former Vanity Fair intern myself-about his experiences at the forefront of modern journalism.