I don't remember the last five years either! [Via]

Six months ago, BP's stock price had been halved from its January high. It seems that pumping 50-odd thousand barrels of oil per day into an open ocean is not a profitable use of oil? (Though, as we'll soon demonstrate, it can be.) With its stock under $30 and Congress sending out hearings e-vites to oil executives, we wondered where BP's stock would be six months later.

At the time, it was already two months after the April 20th rig explosion. Who knew how long it would be until BP could stop the open flow of oil? (Remember when setting the Gulf of Mexico on fire was [...]

That's down 136 in the first 70 minutes of trading. But! Citi up nearly 5%…. to $2.85. Heh.

Today's exciting market plunge, with massive selling at open, appears to have hit bottom, but that was neat. (Also, may I point out that people are now using the phrase "a deteriorating jobs market" so very soon after they were using the phrase "end of the recession"?)

• It isn't. It's actually just taking a brief break from going "up."

• Nobody knows.

• People get paid a lot of money to pretend to know.

• Stuff is so messed up, it could be any number of things really. The paper says "on intensifying investor fears about a slowdown in global economic growth" and that's such a huge load of baloney. Oh, the investors feel fear about the globe? Cool story, bro. I mean, the DOW is scaled averages of share prices of 30 companies, not people's feelings about Europe's debt crisis. (Right, that's why Home Depot shares are down 10%.) It's called TAKING MONEY [...]

There's big profit-taking market moves during the mini-rally! CEOs and chairmen are selling the holy bejeesus out of their stocks. For one, Jeff Bezos cashed in for $65 million on Amazon-somewhere near 1% of his Amazon stock holdings-and then sold some more, three days later.