Haven't seen the Post go in on someone this hard in years. But the Bungalow 8 farewell party for Tabber Benedict, who's off to state prison for drunkenly running down a bicyclist, really gave them an opening: "'I feel terrible for Tabber because I know there’s no table service where he’s headed,' sniffed fellow socialite Justin Ross Lee. 'He’s the most pretentious person I’ve ever met.'"

"Denise Hale went on to recall that when she first arrived in New York, aged 22, the society hostess Elsa Maxwell advised her how to throw great parties: 'Be ruthless, my child. Don't invite your favorite aunt and all your cousins.'"

Handy guide! How to differentiate your English socialites in New York named Poppy.