A series dedicated to explaining Britain's manufactured celebrities to an American audience.

We must begin today, I’m afraid, by sullying our hands with the unsavory subject of brand association, that ineffable pillar of culture responsible for such teachable moments as the Kardashianisation of Christian Louboutin stilettoes (poor Christian must look at Kim’s plastic parts hovering atop his red-soled nude peep-toes and wonder if it’s all worth it) and Abercrombie & Fitch’s callous proposal that our old friend Mike the Situation be paid not to wear A&F clothes. So here’s a tricky philosophical conundrum, a Zen kōan for the 1 percent set, as it were: a famous Russian oligarch [...]

I think the contestant should choose bachelor no. 1. Because he likes good food and he's obviously not hung up on societally prescribed gender roles.

In 1966, the Beach Boys enjoyed a top ten pop hit with "Sloop John B," their version of a West Indies folk song that the poet Carl Sandberg included in his 1927 book, The American Songbag, and that producer Alan Lomax recorded the Cleveland Simmons Group singing in the Bahamas in 1935, and that the Kingston Trio had covered in 1958. In 2010, representatives of the Beach Boys are threatening to sue Katy Perry for the inclusion of one line from one of their own songs, 1965's "California Girls," in her song, "California Gurls," which has sold three million copies this summer. (The line is, "I [...]

"Excuse, Mr. Snoop Dogg?" "Yes?" "Sorry to bother you, sir. But HBO called. They want to know if you'll do a promotional rap for the True Blood show." "Oh, True Blood? Yeah, sure. I like that show." "When should I tell them you'll have it done?" "About fifteen minutes." "Very good, sir."

"I just wanna apologize as a man because I know I was wrong. And when you're wrong, you're supposed to admit you're wrong. You ain't supposed to walk around with that feeling like, Ahh, nigga, I ain't sayin' none of that, nigga! That's not how I get down." From Rap Radar, from Rasha Entertainment, a civics lesson from the always-enjoyable Snoop Dogg.

Man, whoever put the make-up on the promo girls in that clip should apologize, too. (Whoa. Hold up. Wait a minute. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I don't have the proper insight into the make-up artist's hustle and his or her struggle… I'm going to [...]

Calvin Cordozar Broadus, Jr. turns forty years old today—incredible, if you remember what it was like to first hear his dulcet, melodic voice bouncing over the spine-tingling beat Dr. Dre made for the titular song of the 1992 Laurence Fishburne/Jeff Goldblum vehicle Deep Cover. Snoop Doggy Dogg, as he was known back then, already seemed like an ageless entity. And he's stayed seeming that way. (Even after he dropped the "Doggy" in his name in the mid-90s.) If he is not the greatest or most important figure in the history of rap, he is probably the most famous and beloved worldwide. The way he reaches his arm around Barbara [...]

"When I heard the royal family wanted to have me perform in celebration of Prince William’s marriage, I knew I had to give them a little something. ’Wet’ is the perfect anthem for Prince William or any playa to get the club smokin’. " —At 4:20 p.m. PT, Snoop Dogg will have a very classy wedding present for the prince: "Wet," an "anthem made for Prince William’s bachelor party and all bachelor parties around the world to follow." Somewhere, 50 Cent is bumming over his inability to think of this idea first.

13. "The sun is shining everyday, but it's far away / Over the world is [unintelligible syllable that sounds like 'blehhh']" ("The sun is shining everyday, but it's far away / Over the world is death," from OneRepublic's "All The Right Moves")

Here it is, everyone: the song that you will not be able to escape this summer, should you choose to leave your house. It is called "California Gurls" [sic] and it features many things, including: A sorta-not-as-barky-as-usual Katy Perry! An audibly leering Snoop Dogg! Dr. Luke's trademarked 8-bit bleeps! Copious references to the California brand of summertime and Daisy Dukes (yes, again!)! David Lee Roth, sadly, was unavailable for comment.

How does Snoop Dogg pull it off? Can you think of anyone else who can produce porn, rack up numerous convictions on drug and weapons charges, publicly flaunt gang affiliation, regularly fraternize with pimps and yet just as regularly go on TV and charm the pants off responsible-citizen types like Ellen and Martha Stewart and the ladies on The View? An important clue was on display during a recent performance in Holland. As the clip above demonstrates, Snoop's success has a lot to do simple good manners. He's just extremely polite.

Man, classic '80s synth music is having a rough couple of days. First there was the desecration of New Order's "True Faith" by George Michael and the Autotune machine that has apparently taken control of mind and relieved him of his faculties. Now Snoop Dogg and T-Pain do something not entirely unsimilar to Yaz's "Situation." (They used Alison Moyet's wonderful bubbly laugh and everything!) "Boom" is also one of the most nonsensical videos I've ever seen. And that's not necessarily a bad thing. But, why did we go through a full minute-and-a-half of post-apocalyptic Tusken raider stuff just to get into the same club we spend most hip-hop [...]

So there's a homeless singer and beatboxer named Red who was hanging out outside the HVW8 Art + Design Studio in L.A. a couple years ago, trying to get his music to rap producer Warren G. The HVW8 guys videotaped him doing his thing and youtubed it. (It sounds much like the beat Timbaland made for Ginuwine's "Pony.") A year and a half later, his performance has been watched 625,000 times-and now, rap stars Cam'ron and Snoop Dogg have made a song out of it. And everybody's looking for Red, so he can get paid.

Last week, HBO put out a promotional video for their vampire series True Blood that featured Snoop Dogg rapping about the show's characters. (I liked it. Not everybody did.) Now the great Port Arthur, Texas-based MC Bun B has recorded a rap over the instrumental track from Outkast's "ATLiens" in celebration of the seventh anniversary of the Japanese clothing company Lafayette.

From Rap Radar, here's a video message Jim Jones had Snoop Dogg make for his mom-who, like most moms, is clearly a big fan. Soon after sending it, Jim Jones got totally busted by his mom for smoking pot.