The Awl http://www.theawl.com/ Be Less Stupid Wed, 16 Nov 2011 12:00:09 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.2 Woman Smiles Good http://www.theawl.com/2011/11/woman-smiles-good http://www.theawl.com/2011/11/woman-smiles-good#comments Wed, 16 Nov 2011 12:00:09 +0000 Alex Balk http://www.theawl.com/2011/11/woman-smiles-good Despite the heartache it conceals, Cheryl Cole's smile is perfect, says Science. Learn the secret formula A x ((S + T + F) – (W + L)) and you too could have a flawless rictus.

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]]> Despite the heartache it conceals, Cheryl Cole's smile is perfect, says Science. Learn the secret formula A x ((S + T + F) – (W + L)) and you too could have a flawless rictus.

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]]> http://www.theawl.com/2011/11/woman-smiles-good/feed 1 The Totally Awesome Recession http://www.theawl.com/2009/06/the-totally-awesome-recession http://www.theawl.com/2009/06/the-totally-awesome-recession#comments Wed, 17 Jun 2009 14:35:31 +0000 Alex Balk http://www.theawl.com/2009/06/the-totally-awesome-recession "Stop being such a negative nelly, unemployed person!"Forbes' Elisabeth Eaves looks at the bright side of These Troubled Times: "OMG you guys how good is this recession? I mean, it sucks if you don't have, like, money or a job or anything, but I totally just refi'd the mortgage on my place and it's like banks are trying to GIVE me money. Plus, it is totally time to shop. Not just on apartments either! Those bitches behind the counters at fancy clothes stores and those preening 'mos in restaurants could not pretend to be more thrilled to see you! And, like, even if you do lose your job, did you really want to to be doing it in the first place? I mean, obvs, I've still got my gig, but if you've just lost yours you should think of it as a total opportunity to do whatever it was you always wanted to do before you had to worry about money and stuff, which I guess you no longer have to do or else I wouldn't be making this suggestion. And, sure, the city's going to get a little bit dirtier, but think of how much creative excitement there's going to be? I mean, whatevs, okay, you get mugged, but if you're poor anyway how much can they really take from you? Seriously, how brills is this whole terrible economy you guys? BEST RECESSION EVER!"

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]]> "Stop being such a negative nelly, unemployed person!"Forbes' Elisabeth Eaves looks at the bright side of These Troubled Times: "OMG you guys how good is this recession? I mean, it sucks if you don't have, like, money or a job or anything, but I totally just refi'd the mortgage on my place and it's like banks are trying to GIVE me money. Plus, it is totally time to shop. Not just on apartments either! Those bitches behind the counters at fancy clothes stores and those preening 'mos in restaurants could not pretend to be more thrilled to see you! And, like, even if you do lose your job, did you really want to to be doing it in the first place? I mean, obvs, I've still got my gig, but if you've just lost yours you should think of it as a total opportunity to do whatever it was you always wanted to do before you had to worry about money and stuff, which I guess you no longer have to do or else I wouldn't be making this suggestion. And, sure, the city's going to get a little bit dirtier, but think of how much creative excitement there's going to be? I mean, whatevs, okay, you get mugged, but if you're poor anyway how much can they really take from you? Seriously, how brills is this whole terrible economy you guys? BEST RECESSION EVER!"

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