This is a great day for America—because the news organizations have spent a ton of money on "covering" Iowa and New Hampshire, and they'll be sending fewer staff and resources to South Carolina, which starts tomorrow, after New Hampshire "votes" today, and which also gets under-covered because it's a three-hour drive down the J. Strom Thurmond Freeway from outside Myrtle Beach to Columbia, as opposed to the one-hour drive from Nashua NH to Concord NH, and the bigger things get, well, all the reporters are kind of lazy and they miss a lot of events, and so you will be hearing less of the Republican primary prattle, which is [...]
Barack Hussein Obama II has finally released his birth certificate (PDF), in order to quiet demands for his official birth time from the nation's well-funded lobby of astrologers. "It's about time," said the victorious president of the American Federation of Astrologers. "Now we as a country can move on, secure in the knowledge of the innermost workings of our leader."
"What's the time difference to Hawaii again for 1961?" said astrologer Rob Brezsny. "Ugh, math!"
The president, a Leo, had proved confounding to astrologers due to inability to confirm his birth time, arousing great suspicion. None could be reached for thorough comment on the meaning of his birth [...]
After the Times blew up with a story in part on how the youngs, who have no jobs, use the foodstamps at the Whole Foods, Salon has followed suit about the youngsters buying the organic chickens and boy are the comments insane.