The Awl

Dustin Lance Black: Mostly Gay Sex Was Invented in, Say, the 1940s

Choire Sicha — Wed, 04 Jan 2012 16:30:46 +0000

So here is raised again the question about why there's no gay sex in the movies, the main answer being "haha studios, obviously, they're total wusses." But the call is also coming from inside the big, dumb, gay house: in particular, the big dumb gay house named Dustin Lance Black, who is the writer, most recently, of the abominable and terribly, ridiculously bad J. Edgar.

Black, who won an Oscar for his Milk screenplay, says that a love scene would have been too revisionist historically. “I certainly didn’t want to see J. Edgar doing it,” says Black, who is gay. “In the 1930s, oftentimes, a loving relationship with gay men was never consummated.”

It... I'm sorry? Say what? I think I'm trying to understand his point but all I can hear is every gay studies professor crapping his pants with laughter. Yes but wait, etc., there's more.

“Here’s my thing with gay sex,” Dustin Lance Black says. “In terms of sex, we get plenty of that every day in our own lives and thrown on the Internet. I feel like what I’m really interested in is gay romance.”

So at least we know who the dumbest Oscar winner since Charlton Heston is. We hereby sentence old DLB to read Love Stories: Sex Between Men Before Homosexuality, for starters.

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The 'NYT' Occupy Wall Street Front Pager Was an Inside Job

Choire Sicha — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 09:40:52 +0000

Kay Merryweather, 34, an artist on the Lower East Side, volunteers at Trinity Church, giving out food. She said that during the financial crisis, when banks were receiving bailouts and financial executives were receiving multimillion-dollar bonuses, the church often ran out before the long lines of working poor were fed. “The bankers were getting all of these millions,” Ms. Merryweather said. “And we didn’t have enough food.”

But not far away, Benny Zable, 66, a longtime activist, was protesting while wearing a gas mask and a suit that read “Work Consume Be Silent Die.” He said his outrage came from the heedlessness of economic growth. “It’s the greed factor,” Mr. Zable said.

"But"? "But"??? That actually isn't at all a "but" transition, you know! Or you don't. Picture the conference call between the desk in New York, the lead writer and the stringers: "This movement seems fractured and confused!" says the editor. "Did you find any people who seem fractured and confused?" The stringers mumble. "Fine, I've got one! I'll write this anecdotal opening thing in myself," says the lead writer, Times' Phoenix bureau chief Marc Lacey. "See, I've got a great 9/11 'truther' wingnut with all kinds of stickers on his guitar case!" (Hmm, pretty well-aged stickers though, right? Pretty sure that guy was already "there" long before the Occupy movement came into being last month.) "Oh and! I've got some chick from Code Pink!" Everyone on the conference call goes oooh. "Jackpot," says the desk in New York, a few blocks from where thousands of people have just completely filled Times Square the other day. With a liberal media like this, who needs Fox News?

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Bloomberg's Girlfriend Still Ladylike, Despite Career, Says Man

Choire Sicha — Mon, 26 Sep 2011 13:10:25 +0000

ANGRILY SHAKING MY HEAD. (From Rebecca Mead's subscriber-only Talk of the Town today on Diana Taylor, who is Mike Bloomberg's human companion.) Good grief, go back to undermining unions, Wilbur Ross, before we send in all the mannish professional women who don't care about showing you their legs.

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Birds Are Just Like Rappers, Apparently

Alex Balk — Fri, 12 Aug 2011 09:40:31 +0000

"Chirping sparrows are actually trading insults like gangster rappers, a new study has shown. What sounds like harmonious song is really the noise of males trying to appear macho, say researchers. And, just like humans, most of the boasting and trading of insults is done to impress the girls." It goes on, but you get the point.

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Phil Collins, Diana Ross In Agreement

Alex Balk — Thu, 04 Nov 2010 09:50:11 +0000

Great moments in... something: "In 1966, The Supremes explained to us that you can't hurry love. Sixteen years later Phil Collins concurred: 'You just have to wait,' he sang, additionally noting that love don't come easy. Those words of wisdom still apply, and particularly so if you're one of those participating in the seemingly eternal worry-go-round of internet dating."

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Justin Beiber: The New Notorious B.I.G.

Dave Bry — Fri, 15 Oct 2010 10:30:07 +0000

Have you heard Justin Beiber rap? He does, under the name "Shawty Mane," over the beat from Harlem MC Vado's recent hit "Speaking In Tongues." Vado, it turns out, highly approves! "He killed it," the Harlem rapper told the Daily News. "He sounded like B.I.G."

For comparison's sake, here's what B.I.G. sounds like:

And here's Vado's original track, featuring his mentor Cam'ron:

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NPR: Swearing Is A Trait of East Coast Elitists

Choire Sicha — Fri, 02 Jul 2010 13:50:59 +0000

Recently, NPR aired the word "goddamned" again, this time in a quote from a Tom Cruise-in-character-as-Les Grossman appearance, and boy howdy is America upset about the taking of the Lord's name in vain. But don't worry, NPR's ombudsman (who is a woman! Which gives me pause that she should be opining on language usage!) is on the case. She writes: "I'm seeing the question through a different lens-one that is not based in the New York-Washington corridor, where this example of offensive language often goes in one ear and out the other." While it's surely true that in "real America" it is sometimes considered offensive to Christians to use "God" or "Jesus" or "The Lord" as an oath, there is no way that you can convince me or ANYONE ELSE IN AMERICA that "swear words," especially including goddamned, are a "beltway," "corridor" thing. (Elitist corridor Vice President Joe Biden be damned, of course.)

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Everyone Agrees: That Second Circuit NYPD Decision Blows

Choire Sicha — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 16:15:17 +0000

This decision by the Second Circuit that the NYPD can keep secret all its documentation about spying on Americans and making mass arrests at the 2004 Republican Convention (which cost the city millions in settlements, let's not forget) is a terrible piece of horseshit.

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Elena Kagan 'Criticized' Supreme Court! Let's Get Her!

Choire Sicha — Thu, 13 May 2010 15:00:13 +0000

Congresscritter Arlen Specter reveals all! In a private meeting, Supreme Court justice nominee Elena Kagan suggested that the Court takes too few cases! Also Kagan suggested that the Court "ERRED" in the abhorrent and disgraceful pro-lobbyist decision in Citizens United v. Federal Election Commission. Crucify her! Related: terrifying scandalous video of meeting released! (In it, they nod and make small talk.) We'll see later today if, while roaming the halls of our nation's capitol, this free-talking would-be justice will get served!

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Google Believes Online Ads Could Be Worth More Than Print Ads by 2012

Choire Sicha — Tue, 11 May 2010 11:20:07 +0000

When you look through the delightful PowerPoint presentation prepared at Google on the newspaper industry, a few things stand out.

Now, this graph, while entertaining, isn't a useful comparison of anything. (You could compare construction employment, or Medicare spending, to GDP, and it would look meaningful, but I'm not sure it really would be!) All this means is "newspaper ad revenue isn't a component of GDP growth," which, well yes.

This seemingly nothing little slide actually reveals huge truths about the newspaper industry. Which is that subscription numbers-while they're the backbone of what newspapers can sell against!-bring in basically negligible income. It also shows the number one mistake of newspapers. If editorial costs are a mere 14% of revenue, then the hugest mistake of the last 5 years has been the brutal hollowing out of editorial staff, which results in less content to sell and, indirectly, in less good content to sell against.

This presentation runs with a piece recapping long talks with Google by James Fallows.

The piece is increasingly vague as it goes, with an alarming lack of examples, but that's Google for you-their method is that they build stuff and see what works and what sticks, and that model totally works in the long term. But one thing that is clear is that everyone at Google seems to believe in massive growth in the role, frequency and even cost of display advertising online.

And then there's this startling sentence from Fallows, summing up what he heard from everyone at Google: "Sooner or later-maybe in two years, certainly in 10-display ads will, per eyeball, be worth more online than they were in print."

The immense gulf between the cost of print ads per eyeball and the value per user of ads online is usually viewed these days as something unresolvable; and so it follows that sites that are attached to newspapers believe they just can't support themselves even on huge traffic. That Google believes otherwise is striking.

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