New York Times columnist Gail Collins was, as always, highly enjoyable yesterday as she predicted that, come the year 2112, history students would be reading "on their vaporphones" about the precedent set when known philander and serial husband New Gingrich won the Republican primary in super-conservative South Carolina. But her ideas run counter to the conventional thinking about what the world will be like a hundred years from now. The definitive source of future-casting for the year 2112 is, of course, Neil Peart, the (totally sick!) drummer and (philosophically ambitious!) lyricist for the great Canadian prog-metal band, Rush. READ MORE

As someone with a very serious interest in seeing Newt Gingrich at the top of the Republican ticket, I was initially disheartened by his recent promise to put an American base on the moon that would eventually become a state. The idea that the moon—a giant piece of space garbage which even Science has admitted is completely worthless—might get itself two (no doubt obstructionist) Senators and a representative in the House is almost too much to take, because it is the moon. It deserves nothing but scorn and pillage. But then I remembered that Republican industrial and environmental policies are essentially designed to promote exploitation and decay, and I suddenly realized that, yes, we should ABSOLUTELY put a base on the moon, and then do to it what we're doing to our own planet. Go Newt! READ MORE

If you were watching C-SPAN last night for the Iowa caucuses, as you should have been, but likely were not, you missed a very brief appearance by an American hero. I can't yet find video of it, and it seems it was only noted by a friend and by one lone Livejournaler, but in essence, some punky-looking kiddo got the microphone at a caucus meeting and made a plea for Newt Gingrich: "Even though he has been married three times, he is a strong defender of marriage. He still stays in touch with most of his kids." Ha! Then he got booed loudly by the caucus and stormed off, yelling "I don't have to take this anymore!" And then C-SPAN cut immediately back to the boring stuff. Politics! Anyway, in the end, Mittens Romney and Rick Santorum emerged virtually tied in Iowa, which, LOL, "enjoy," and also none of this means anything, maybe go read a book until June.

Opposition research—political Dumpster diving perfected by Lee Atwater and Roger Stone—has been a part of American politics for nearly 200 years. Your familiarity with Willie Horton, the Rev. Jeremiah Wright and John Edwards' $400 haircut is a tribute to its irritating persistence as a campaign tool. What follows is oppo research, but we do not aim to inflict damage. In fact, The Awl's effort, a collection of early media mentions of the Republican candidates (sometimes appearing under their given names), may actually endear these Presidential hopefuls to you. Or am I the only one charmed by 11-year-old zoo booster Newton Gingrich? READ MORE

"His demons have been dancing across the national stage for nearly two decades, since he emerged on Capitol Hill as the tantrum-prone enfant terrible of the mid-1990s Republican revolution. They’ve done the jitterbug, tango and gavotte, and at this late date can’t have too many new moves left or much more leg to show." READ MORE

Gingrich: There is a lot of big government behind Romneycare, not as much as Obamacare, but a heck of a lot more than your campaign is admitting. READ MORE

Perpetual presidential candidate Newt Gingrich made news last month when it was revealed he and his wife Callista carried a credit line of up to $500,000 at Tiffany, a jewelry store catering to the powerful and virtuous. He made news again last week when it was revealed he had a second line of credit—this one up to $1,000,000. (New Gingrich’s top fundraising staff has since quit.) READ MORE

The editorial board of The Daily Pennsylvanian is extremely disappointed with its fellow students! You see, "A group of students stormed out of Irvine Auditorium in protest while [Newt] Gingrich was still speaking. One of them shouted as he left." HOW UNCOUTH. What's more? Someone called him a "salamander" and "some students hung posters of the politician’s face and some of his controversial quotes on doors of bathroom stalls and above urinals." What in the world is going on at UPenn that these children are so remarkably measured and polite in their demonstrations against a visiting antisocial fraud-adoring grifter?