Here is some excellent news: "[R]esearch reported today in the journal Heart found that men who consume large or very large amounts of alcohol are least at risk of developing [coronary heart disease], which kills more than 90,000 Britons a year. Men who drink regularly, even in small quantities, are more than 30% less likely to suffer from heart disease, it found. But those who drink the most cut their risk by the most. Those classed as high consumers of alcohol, between 30 and 90 grams per day, had 54% less chance of getting the disease, while those deemed to have a very high intake, of more than 90 grams or at least eight glasses of wine a day, were 50% less likely." Experts caution that while alcohol may, in fact, help reduce the–BLAH BLAH BLAH I CAN'T HEAR YOU BECAUSE I AM FILLING MY EARS WITH DELICIOUS ALCOHOL RIGHT NOW. Ladies and gentlemen, I am NEVER GOING TO DIE. Thank you! 32