The Awl

How Morrissey Ended Ugliness

Alex Balk — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 09:05:12 +0000

"The thing to be in 1983 is handsome."

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Who Is Actually Bringing Meat To A Morrissey Gig In The First Place?

Alex Balk — Wed, 13 Jul 2011 13:50:39 +0000

"Ticket buyers who were entering Morrissey's gig at Middlesborough Town Hall last Friday (July 8) were searched in case they were carrying any meat products, according to reports."

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Dog Bites Sad Man

Alex Balk — Mon, 11 Jul 2011 14:20:14 +0000

"Morrissey sustained hand and arm injuries recently after being attacked by a dog in England." I wonder if black is how he tastes on the inside. [Via]

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Three New Morrissey Tracks

Choire Sicha — Wed, 15 Jun 2011 10:20:11 +0000

Morrissey's last album, 2009's "Years of Refusal," was so much better than it had to be—with at least three tracks that were actually terrific, A+ Morrissey material, and at least three more that were solidly really good. So the advance from his new album (which does not yet have a label??) is disappointing—he played three songs live on BBC Radio 2 last night and they were not so enjoyable! (Despite each of them having pretty terrific Morrissey titles.) Above is "The Kid's a Looker," the one I like best. Perhaps these songs will be formulated, in their final versions, into wonderfulness?

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Morrissey Has A Lot To Say

Alex Balk — Thu, 21 Apr 2011 13:50:10 +0000

Morrissey is in agreement with his former bandmate Johnny Marr: British Prime Minister David Cameron is not allowed to like the Smiths. He also claims to have written 660 pages of a forthcoming memoir!

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Thirteen Songs Inspired By Serial Killers

Dave Bry — Tue, 05 Apr 2011 14:00:24 +0000

Apart from being terrifying and horrific, serial killers are oddly fascinating. Why do we find ourselves so obsessed over them? Is it just the fear and revulsion, or is something else at play? And it's not just us. Songwriters are often inspired by serial killers. Here are thirteen songs with extremely sinister origins.

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A Million Redondo Beach Sardines Are Gone Gone

Dave Bry — Wed, 09 Mar 2011 10:50:19 +0000

Late afternoon, what is that smell?
We just had the quarrel that sent you away.
I was looking for you, are you gone gone?
Check out all those seagulls, out over King Harbor.
What have they found there? Probably something to eat.
I went looking for you, are you gone, gone?

Down by the ocean it was so dismal,
Women all standing with a shock on their faces.
Sad description, oh I was looking for you.

Everyone said a million sardines had washed up
On Redondo Beach and everyone is so sad.
I was looking for you, are you gone gone?
"Remember all the birds?" Everyone cried.
But it's really quite normal, when lots of animals die.
I went looking for you, are you gone gone?

Down by the ocean it was so dismal,
Women all standing with shock on their faces.
Sad description, oh I was looking for you.

Desk clerk told me sardines washed up,
Packed into the harbor, like a giant tin can.
I went looking for you, are you gone gone?
Surrounding the sailboats, no oxygen left.
They float belly-up, like a carpet of death.
One day they're all there all here, but now they're gone gone.

Down by the ocean it was so dismal.
I was just standing with shock on my face.
Eighteen solid inches of rotting dead fish.
"We need to get rid of them," said sergeant Phil Keenan,
"This is going to create a terrible pollution and public health issue if we don't."

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Morrissey Likes Bears, Dislikes Bear Hats

Alex Balk — Tue, 03 Aug 2010 14:50:14 +0000

"There is no clever distinction in trapping and skinning bears for petty considerations based on vanity. Concern for all beings – human or animal – is a kindness and a goodness that springs from somewhere much deeper than Royal duty, and like it or not, the Guards wearing real fur reflects the human spirit at its lowest."
-In a letter to the Times of London signed "Morrissey, Singer, Cheshire," singer Morrissey of Cheshire expresses dismay at the millinery sported by the Queen's Guards outside Buckingham Palace.

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Dour Troubadour Expresses Dismay Over Impending Nuptials Between Harlequin and Chanteuse

Alex Balk — Fri, 30 Jul 2010 09:50:58 +0000

"He swooned and sighed, 'Oh, left hand third finger, don't do it.' It was just so eloquent and poetic and like one of his songs."
-There is NOTHING about this article that doesn't make me sad, and I'm sure it will give Awl pal Maura Johnston a continuing series of aneurysms, but here you go: Morrissey (yes, that one) has supposedly advised Russell Brand and Katy Perry against marrying. Also, Katy thinks Russ is too into Britpop. And a bunch of other stuff. At this point your best-case scenario for optimism is to hope that, like most of the stories in the British tabs, this is somehow made up.

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The 85 Best Morrissey Solo Songs, In Order

Choire Sicha — Wed, 02 Dec 2009 13:32:14 +0000

85. The Father Who Must Be Killed
84. Let me Kiss You
83. Life is a Pigsty
82. Friday Mourning
81. I Knew I was Next
80. I Am Two People
79. Ganglord
78. Sing Your Life
77. There's a Place in Hell for Me and My Friends
76. I'm the End of the Family Line
75. The Ordinary Boys
74. Because of my Poor Education
73. He Cried
72. Sunny
71. Mexico
70. Will Never Marry
69. First of the Gang to Die
68. Mute Witness
67. Alma Maters
66. Seasick, Yet Still Docked
65. Driving Your Girlfriend Home
64. I Am Hated for Loving
63. Nobody Loves Us
62. My Life is a Succession of People Saying Goodbye
61. I'll Never Be Anybody's Hero Now
60. Come Back to Camden
59. Tomorrow
58. It's Not Your Birthday Any More
57. King Leer
56. Angel, Angel Down We Go Together
55. I Just Want to See the Boy Happy
54. Billy Budd
53. Best Friend on the Payroll
52. Southpaw
51. Christian Dior
50. If You Don't Like Me, Don't Look At Me
49. The Loop
48. Don't Make Fun of Daddy's Voice
47. Interesting Drug
46. At Amber
45. Hold on to Your Friends
44. Certain People I Know
43. He Knows I'd Love to See Him
42. Hairdresser on Fire
41. The Harsh Truth of the Camera Eye
40. Satan Rejected my Soul
39. I've Changed my Plea to Guilty
38. Mama Lay Softly on the Riverbed
37. Why Don't You Find Out For Yourself?
36. I Have Forgiven Jesus
35. In the Future When All's Well
34. I Like You
33. Found Found Found
32. Good Looking Man About Town
31. TIE: I Don't Mind if You Forget Me and I Know It's Going to Happen Someday
30. Will Never Marry
29. The National Front Disco
28. All the Lazy Dykes
27. Such a Little Thing Makes Such a Big Difference
26. I Know Very Well How I Got My Name
25. The World is Full of Crashing Bores
24. Picadilly Palare
23. We Hate It When Our Friends Become Successful
22. Now My Heart is Full
21. Munich Air Disaster 1958
20. When Last I Spoke To Carol
19. Late Night, Maudlin Street
18. Our Frank
17. I Will See You in Far Off Places
16. Irish Blood, English Heart
15. Disappointed
14. Asian Rut
13. Black Cloud
12. Sister I'm a Poet
11. November Spawned a Monster
10. Every Day Is Like Sunday
9. Yes, I Am Blind
8. That's How People Grow Up
7. All You Need Is Me
6. You're the One for Me, Fatty
5. Something is Squeezing My Skull
4. Jack the Ripper
3. The Last of the Famous International Playboys
2. Spring-Heeled Jim
1. You're Gonna Need Someone on Your Side

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